Buh-bye. Go chase ambulances.

Spoiled. Fucking. Brat. How’d that dream team thing work out with Andy Reid? You don’t have it to play in the bigs Vince. Never did.

Can you put more ads on Deadspin? Can you add more buggy links and pop=ups too? You’re almost like The Big Lead now. Without the links to Cowherd. Go work on that.

OH GOD!! UNWRITTEN RULES!!! Fuck baseball until Oct 1.

Fuck the NHL. Fuck Gary Bettman. Great sport. Stupid business model.

How does Milbury still have a job with NBC? Does he have photos of Bob Costas with a goat?

I’ve decided to take my talents to committing an uncalled offensive foul almost every time I drive.

I want this motherfucker and his children to die in prison. Let’s go with those investigations please.

Fucking Yinzers don’t even understand the puck has to go in the net, not on top of it, to count. Fuck them. Fuck Rapeliesberger too.

The phrase “Do you want fries with that?” will give him a new and rewarding career.

Swearengen, Wu. Hang-dai!

Love Lebron. Hate the Warriors. Got it. Hacks.

Fuck Ken Starr with a baseball bat dipped in ground glass. On TV. In prime time. Hosted by Ryan Seacrest.

Decaf is in the orange pot.

1st Amendment, motherfucker. Have someone read it/explain it to you and your idiot boss. There’s a reason it’s first.

Suckers. The perfect festival for the Trump year.

Anal probes all around for the Department of Homeland Security. Keep calling people.

All Screamin’ A, all the time.

Hey Bill—how’s it feel to be working from your Mom’s basement?