Well done.

Best thing I’ve seen all day. Spoiled fucking brats.

Pending rule change: third base bags will not be allow to make contact with a baserunner’s face. Posey Rule 2.0.

Is his 15 minutes up yet? I’m bored.

When can we get the up-close-and-personal-really-written-by-myself Players’ Tribune version of this incredibly important and emotional moment?

Way to go Orlando. Oh, and fuck Brett Favre. Overrated interception machine.

Will she be handling any under-inflated balls?

Drew: you forgot or don’t know about the stadium. In September and October, fans on the south side are fried to death by the sun before halftime. Go check the 3rd quarter of any game at this shithole—the entire south side (the side the cameras are pointed towards) are empty the entire second half. Well done Jed.

Eagle fan who lives in the Bay Area, where fans are looking forward to Chipper’s “innovative” offense. Here’s what they can expect: a) he’ll ship most of your best talent out of town in the first 2 seasons, while claiming he has no influence on personnel; b) his innovative offense consists of running the same 12 plays…

HOF: Lil Abner. OK, now wheel me back to the TV room.

Ken Starr’s finest hour.

People have finally realized that a game you can play walking around is more entertaining than Beyonce. Our long national nightmare might finally be over.

I’m sure they hate Trump, but that tweet does not currently appear on the Rolling Stones’ Twitter feed. Are you sure that’s real?

He still could have BENGHAZI’d his way out of this if he tried.

Zee got this crap beat out of him in Philly after the last game before the ‘82 strike. The thing is: Washington fans were always pretty cool visiting Philly (unlike other divisional fans back then). He must have put on quite a show, since (if memory serves) Washington won in the waning seconds of the game. So, to…

Hello friend! I really hope he gets to enjoy prison, but I’ll place large wager that he’ll pull the old Ken Lay maneuver of dying before he goes to trial.

I can’t believe you all get so wound up about this “sport.” MLS is more interesting (MLS sucks).

Since when does CBS have any control on boxing? If Thurman was on HBO or even in AA Showtime the article would have some merit. But CBS? Is Denton paying you by the word? Oh wait . . .

Which lead to the game where he did the fake end-game kneel and go for a touchdown since Landry played his starters against scabs weeks before. I was there. It was glorious. Fuck Tom Landry.

Hey! AJ! You’re out of the bunker? Welcome back!