*in Stefon’s voice

The covidtests.gov site seems to be live now, with a way to order tests through USPS? I went ahead and entered my address.

But then I don’t understand the whole Starbucks culture. Sure, I’ll drink their mocha once in awhile, but no over-roasted, overpriced and sugary drink they sell is worth sitting in a drive-thru line that wraps around their building; which is what you usually see at a Starbucks. I guess maybe Starbucks is some people’s…

The share button doesn’t even include a link to the site. I saw all of my Twitter posting the squares so I looked on the app store where there is indeed a “Wordle” but I noticed it didn’t have the same color scheme so I googled it first.

With all due respect to this hack, just buy a toilet plunger. They aren’t expensive, and are an essential item to have in any home. If you somehow don’t have one and clog your toilet, just leave it and go to the nearest store and purchase one. If it’s late find the nearest 24 hour store. If there isn’t one near you,…

A male passenger told her “it was an inappropriate comment and that she ‘isn’t Black … this isn’t Alabama and this isn’t a bus.’” He then said, “Sit down, Karen.”

The Madden curse eventually gets everyone.

Also, don’t get them wet, and never, ever feed them after midnight.

Or move next door to a CFA and make a better sandwich.

As a man allow me to mansplain the use of mansplaining in this article: Sometimes it’s funny to just toss it around, especially in an article about the Bachelorette.

i like doing bicep curls shirtless in front of my wife. i’m not buff or anything like that and i hate using my resistance bands, but i’ve lose 26 lbs since may and i like the way she looks at me.

Not understanding what is so damn important about eating out in a restaurant. I am all for supporting the businesses, but at this point it is ridiculous.

He should have just complied.

Okay, look, yes. I put a whole bunch of porn up there.  My parents were coming over and I had to hide it someplace.  

Tell that to the billion dollar corporations that don’t pay taxes and take loans they never pay back. That would benefit America a lot more.  

Remember, folks, many of your fellow citizens are selfish psychopaths who would rather you or your loved ones needlessly suffer and die, than they have to do without a petty luxury for themselves.

 They know who their target market is: Men with small penises.

As is usual with these sort of things, this probably means they have plans for their own Mario hardcore xxx game.