This (did I do that right for an article cross-posted to Jezebel?)!

In other breaking news, America will continue to stage blackout in watching WNBA.

Yes. Yes they are.

Can we all agree that white dudes should not wear flat-brimmed hats? Also black dudes, and any other color dudes?

Two out of three ain’t bad. If we can just get her out of the tank for Cheeto Jesus...

Yellow jackets and honey bees look a lot alike to kids. Honey bees have barbed stingers, and almost always leave them in after stinging. Plus yellow jackets are way more fond of hanging around water than bees. My guess is you got hit by a yellow jacket.

I make steak carpaccio all the time, and have never had issues. The key to serving raw beef is to use quality cuts from a reputable grocer (ie. DO NOT MAKE BEEF TARTARE WITH A TUBE OF GROUND BEEF FROM WALMART).

OK, so I’m married, but would you consider a “friends with benefits” relationship? The benefits in this case being totally one-sided, and comprised of you making this dish for me.

It’s easy. Next time you’re constipated, just walk into one of their chains and order a glass of water. Even the water at Chili’s will clean you out.

I tell my kids not to be afraid of bees, and we leave their nests alone. But I find any yellow jacket, wasp, or hornets nest? I run like a motherfucker and spray poison on them after the sun goes down. Their population is too low to contribute much to pollination (at least where I live), and they are violent,…

I am horrified by that image. Beautiful, but horrifying.

As a conservative and former Fox News Channel watcher (prior to it becoming the Bout of Explosive Diarrhea After Consuming Copious Amounts of Fireballs, Cheetos, and Glow Sticks New Channel), I have an important question: What’s the official chin count on old Rog? Two or three?

I agree that slut is a nasty term. But would you want to be with a man that was promiscuous? I know Mrs. MetalKing’sRevenge would not exist today if I was a manslut.

I didn’t notice him making any comments about sluts. But then again, it might be a micro-aggression that is invisible to the naked eye.

As a conservative (now married, so I am only DTF with Mrs. MetalKing’sRevenge), I can say your statement is demonstrably false. Many of us lean very heavily Libertarian.

Conservative here. Not sure if you mean this comment as a positive or negative, but my response is: I agree.

I’m of two minds on you take.

Finally...finally a non-soccer post. Christ, I watched some of that crap while getting my haircut today. Never seen so much flopping and injury faking since [insert last time I watched soccer]. Do coaches encourage that shit? How can any professional athlete have so little dignity and sportsmanship.

Excellent read, but I still have one question: How did you take off your underwear without taking off your pants?

I wore a 15-pound beard of bees for that woman, but it just wasn’t enough.