Simulate the game on Tecmo SuperBowl with updated rosters. Winner of the simulation wins the game.

Hey Russell, here’s an idea to avoid ties. Throw for a fucking touchdown.

The point is, after 74 minutes and 53 seconds of terrible football, and as a result of numerous plays that never should’ve happened in a professional league, Larry Fitzgerald caught a meaningless 15-yard pass to just barely win me my fantasy game.

Best. Soccer game. Ever.

Draper:

The good thing is they aren’t stuck with this failing business model for an entire season, they can choose a new one everyday!

why don’t some of the employees that won millions help chip in?

Suh was quoted as saying, “I’m... FIFTY!” during the play.

“After reviewing the video evidence, and consulting with our teams physicians, we have concluded Ben Roethlesberger did not suffer a concussion” - NFL Memo in 3 days.

Totally agree! As soon as I learned that some players actually got injured playing this game I immediately stopped watching and forced my family to do so as well. It’s hard for me to imagine that you can receive concussions with a helmet.

Yes unions drive up wages, but at what cost? Employee productivity. Unions only favor the incompetent members and the Union executives. Better employees are locked into standardized pay raises and advancement ladders thus removing the incentive to be a better employee than the person next to you.

I can’t let him die in vain

I haven’t seen fanatics trade so many killer punches since Jonestown, 1978.

Everyone’s a liberal until they have to be one.

The reason for the decline is Colin Kaepernick. I for one haven’t watched him play even a snap all season.

Another thing they all have in common: none of them have been in my kitchen

The Ravens announced that as soon as the fan’s condition is upgraded to stable, they will hold a press conference for him to apologize for his role in the incident.

He got all huffy.

Obviously, the fans shouldn’t be cheering a walk-off until the opposing team has had ample time to consider a challenge. It’s an unwritten rule that’s been around since the advent of replay. Everybody knows this.

Did the Idiot On The Field put his hands on someone?