Thinks to himself: Whore pills? Satan's candy? Those things my wife gets free from her health insurance so that we don't have too many kids?

*That conflicted feeling you get when something good happening requires something bad to have occurred first as the impetus*

Fair enough. What's the solution for the article, though? I don't know how large the plot is, but the dog parks I've been to have also had external seating for those who want to read, etc. but not be in with the dogs.

Yeah, and you definitely get the stinkeye for walking through one (even if that's where the public path goes!).

I don't think this is kids vs. dogs so much as places where more people (and their pets) can go to enjoy the outdoors. Kids, dogs, and adults (with or without dogs or kids) can go to dogparks—however, only adults with kids can go to a playground. There's a higher functional usage to having a dogpark, particularly if a…

I agree—it's probably a combination of male entitlement and celebration of male sexuality vs. the shaming of women's. However, context is likely to be present in every encounter—there are reasons why walking up to someone in a bar and saying "you look great tonight!" is more acceptable than doing so while that person…

Look at it this way: "Hi, I want to interrupt whatever you are doing (which I deem inferior to what I want to say) to tell you that my dick likes you. The only acceptable responses I will take are a smile or thanks. Should you look uncomfortable, I will tell you to smile, because I see the utterance on behalf of my…

I may have to sit her down and figure this out.

Yes, and called me in between drunken bouts. She said she had liked the show and wanted to sleep with a semi-famous person. Of all of the people she could have chosen on that show though... I teased her a bunch.

Rest in peace, Robin. Your work made me feel.

Fun fact: I know someone who has slept with him. His best pickup line? " You have big boobs."

Seriously. They need to leave that shit to TSA professionals.

Well, that chair doesn't come cheap. Fava beans are all one can purchase. *makes sucking noise against teeth*

In this version of the story, the hose is one of those showerheads that also doubles as a masturbatory aid.

"What are you doing tonight?"

I'm glad to have brightened your work day :-)

See what they made me do?! Messing with me was an udder miss steak...those cow herds.

Pasture/Pasteurization harassment!

Ugh! These Welfare Creams are just ruining America.

Don't make me go all Carrie-cow at the prom.