By reminding myself that the insanity will only undergo a key change that day. It won’t go away.

Oh, come on, it looks amazing! It even contains weightless coffee!

Regional, I don’t know. I’ve encountered them in Orlando and Chicago.

I was always partial to this as far as parodies of Chick Tracts:

I got one on my car windshield while I was inside the mall movie theater watching Deadpool.

He and his brother are in a fighting phase

Tammy Duckworth as Aragorn

oh god her employment contract probably says something in really tiny print like if Trump doesn’t win she has to issue a mea culpa and pay back half her salary

Shit Juggling with a Blind Baboon, Trurd Polishing and Being Able to Collect a Paycheck From the Mentality Infirm

Not only that, but it’s a smart play on his part because now if his followers believe that the media are biased against him, then that lends extra credence to anything positive they might say about him, thereby reconfirming their support.

Right? I understand some of the criticisms leveled in the comments here, but *that*? It’s like taking a Baldwin/McKinnon debate sketch and saying “that wasn’t funny because debates have larger audiences and Kate McKinnon is not as old as Hillary Clinton and also it was shorter than a real debate.”

there’s a basketball league for three year olds in my neighborhood so I guess this is technically possible.

My six year old son heard that line this morning and started cracking up.

“Whether it’s true or not” is like “Posting just in case” on social media. Judges should be better than that. We all should, but especially judges and others with that kind of influence.

As a not fat woman who gets no sex from anyone, anywhere, at any time, you’re super cool and do you have a newsletter because I want to subscribe.

Shot. The man said shot. He wants her to die. And I will bet you $20 that if you ask him exactly why she deserves to be shot he won’t even know. That’s the infuriating part. They have no idea what crime to even accuse her of.

This is like what happens to me with fingerprint scanners.

Physician’s Formula is the only one I’ve ever found that doesn’t make my eyelids swell up for five days like I’ve been stung by a bee.

Physician’s Formula is the only one I’ve ever found that doesn’t make my eyelids swell up for five days like I’ve…

OOOOO ME ME ME ME ME ME ME! Whoever wins, if you don’t have anyone to go with, bring me! I am super fun.

So with ya. I spent years tethered to a phone, resetting passwords. I had a master’s. There were MBAs in there resetting passwords. The attitude people gave us was ridiculous.