A bright pink boutonniere, perhaps?

The dog breath is a small price to pay for Frito feet.

That would be a goddamned dream come true.

I KNEW IT. Thank you.

I just need to know why, out of that entire list, "Donkey" is the one capitalized?

You could not possibly be more right.

How dare you insult Bill Pullman that way!

Fneh and Loathing in Las Vegas/Fnehver Been Kissed/Flight of the Fnehvigator.

I feel tricked. I DEMAND 300 SANDWICHES AS RECOMPENSE.

It is now. :)

Can we agree that this is not news to be reported on Jezebel

"I want to explore, and try new things! But not too many new things... And nothing weird, like no weird foods... And it has be like like something I have all the time at home, except in a new place... Ooh, let's get Haagen-Daz in FRANCE!"

Haha. I'm sure I'd be a fan of your sister's work if I knew her and wasn't the target. :D

It's large for Minnesota. ;)

This doesn't really ring of a a girls' prank. I mean, calling it a "vagina inspection" per "health code 69" smacks of teenage boy. You can practically smell the Axe body spray all over it.

Pfft, we live in post-racial 'Murica! Wasn't this problem solved by Obamacare?

Be that as it may, it's not the first time they've force-fed me and I threw up as a result. I had a history of it. There is no forgiveness in this esophagus!

I understand that parents have a hard time getting their kids to eat, but sometimes it's just not worth the battle. Especially when the kid is old enough to make some of their own decisions based on past experience.

No joke, if you use vomiting as a tactical weapon, NOBODY WILL FUCK WITH YOU.