A friend’s not-yet-three-month-old baby was exposed to measles at that very hospital. He was not yet old enough for his MMR vaccine, and had had a fever for two weeks. They were told to take him to Children’s ER. He’s doing much better now. This anti-vax bullshit is affecting ALL races, ALL walks of life. Children…

Good thing we have a gay misogynist male here to tell us how women are supposed to feel!

But it’s cool to let a male cop in the bathroom. Because male cops have an incidence of, what, four times the national average when it comes to DV, and how many times the national average of rape and sexual assault? Hmm. I’ll take the boyish looking girl over the cop ANY day.

He’s a regular Mother Fuckin’ Theresa, that one! I hope he sets up a charity, “Homes for the Riff-Raff.” It can join the ranks of “Shoes for the Legless” and “Abortions for the Non-Pregnant.”

I know what next year’s Halloween costume will be. I already have the fruit hat from dressing up as a fruit bat last year! I shouldn’t be proud of that fact, should I...?

Thank you for commenting on a two year old post...

It’s like Freshman Orientation Day. *readies paddle, raging boner*

Chick TOTALLY looks like Rosamund Pike.

Also, flag the fuckers! Flag flag flag. Nothing will be done unless we actually notify them that there are trolls.

So I’m not the only one who reads these and feels like: a) I’ve done things completely wrong, or; b) It must be fun to live in Imaginaryland?

Oh god, the bowl cut. AKA the “Dorothy Hamill.” I DIDN’T KNOW WHO THE FUCK DOROTHY HAMILL WAS!

I’m not really sure if my mom just couldn’t do hair or makeup, or if she was so sick of me hating every hairstyle she gave me, but she never taught me to do my own hair or makeup. My dad probably would have been more on board for it if I’d asked him.

GAWD I hate that term.

Look, guys! We found the giant asshole! We can all rest easy tonight.

I just want to hug you super hard right now and never let go. Jeez, have you ever seen a flock of thirstier bitches?

He looks a lot like my ex-bf, so I imagine sex with Renner would be a lot of mechanical in-and-out, and then he’d collapse in a pile of giggles after cumming.

Adult crushing is cute until your husband becomes obsessed with your coworker, and the two of you haven’t had sex more than once a year for the entire time you were married, but suddenly he just can’t get his mind off her, even though he really, really wants to make it work with you, as if you’re some fucking…

It was a happy coincidence.

The cheesy filling would be nice, though. I think we might make for nice slow-cooked cuts. Maybe excess fat-caps, though

Just the right balance of sweet, salty, and umami...