Anybody *good* would be fine.

Gosh, why take the unnecessary risk of leaving the house at all?

This *might* have been funny to the exact same people who are old enough to get the “wall in Berlin” joke.

Here’s your Hot Taker:

This is a stupid fucking argument. You bat around after nine batters — the entire order — have batted, and the 10th is up to the plate. Christ.

Kid was 0-for-5 with five strikeouts in his pro debut in Boise two years ago, so probably safe to say that first impressions of this kind can often be misleading.

+1,000,000

Boston — The Worldwide Leader in Pretentious Martyrdom.

It also seems strange to think that 1 sack (-1.39) could more than outweigh three touchdown passes (1.11). In fact, in this scoring system, Tony Romo would score only about 1.7 points for a game against the Bears last season in which he was 21 of 26 for 205 yards, three touchdowns and no picks — and the Cowboys won…

Exactly, EXACTLY right. Deron murdered him, made the front office decide him or me. And given that Deron was the young player with the big contract and seemingly limitless potential — and given that management had passed from astute if goofy owner Larry Miller to an assortment of idiot hayseed relatives and…

Goddammit.

Boy, I remember the good old days when he just had the outs in his contract at Utah, in case he got the Notre Dame, Michigan or Ohio State jobs ...

Say what you will, but thank GOD somebody finally had the guts to call out the uber-fist-pumping that is ruining — just RUINING — sports.

Why would you expect a Cubs signing to not be broken?

“Not so crazy?” How about “standard operating procedure?” If you have a hard time believing an NFL team would stake out a plane or a bar or a freakin’ beauty salon, then you are just the kind of fan Roger Goodell has been looking for.

Leon Fucking Durham.

Goddammit.

Freakin' tell me about it. The Yahoo score tracker on my phone even had the incorrect final score for more than 30 minutes after the game. I had the Utes +6, so at least I didn't lose. But goddamn it ...

It takes a lot of hard, goddamn work to make the NCAA seem like the sensible one.

Literally laughed out loud on that one. Even my daughter wanted to know what was so funny. Well done, sir!