That, or his wife has gained a hell of a lot of weight since the scandal started. Maybe she's a stress eater.

That rule doesn't do straight women any favors, either. All of "the Bible says men should be in charge" morons get a free pass to hate on young feminists.

I'm a devout atheist, too, but pretty much all the hotels and motels I've stayed at for the past few years have had Bibles in the rooms. (Mariott hotel rooms also have the Book of Mormon!)

...and, as if in response to my own question, a CNN story about Cain's wife appeared in Google Reader a few minutes ago. "Gloria Cain is rarely seen on the campaign trail and, so far, has not been available to media outlets clamoring to speak with her." You don't say, CNN, you don't say.

Yes, "gullible" is the word I would/should have used it if I'd thought it out more, but it was kind of a blurted-out thought, you know?

So far, the national Democrats are still acting like they're expecting Romney to be the nominee — they're targeting him in press releases and online videos. The "tip" probably came from a Republican campaign, or someone with a more personal grudge. (Many of the best stories about Sarah Palin's antics in Alaska, for…

I want to apologize in advance for how I say this, but I'm trying to be true to the moment:

When I was 30, I bought the cheapest possible polyester "vampire cape" at a drug store, put on a lot of black clothing, and walked around with a Joy Division CD telling people my costume was "Over-The-Hill Goth."

Seriously, if that's the sluttiest pumpkin costume they've got, nobody at CBS is a Jezebel reader!

It's a shame they're missing Halloween. I bet JoyceLynn Aryan Nation already had her "Sexy Hitler" costume ready for trick-or-treating.

I misread the bit about the Kardashian-endorsed "towels" as "trowels." That also made me think about their makeup issues.

I saw a Unicorn Girl and a Sexy Batgirl on Saturday night. But that was Theatre Bizarre's party, so those outfits were a little tame for that crowd.

Is this a "having 100 words for snow" kind of thing? What the hell IRC channel were you on that discussed vaginas that much?

I think TLC just found its next reality show!

I imagine life must be very difficult for Not Gay Republicans. If you're a Not Gay Republican, you're apparently being constantly followed around by male escorts with cameras, just waiting for you to let your guard down and take off your pants. How is a Not Gay Republican supposed to get on with the important job of…

Tax babies? Shouldn't Bachmann be demanding we tax fetuses? She thinks they're people, too.

I nominate him for Dad of the Year. Specifically, the year 1066.

But just think, if you had saved him, he might have said "I owe you my life! How can I repay you?" and you could have said "STOP MAKING INDIANA JONES MOVIES." You'd have been a hero to millions!

Well, this explains why all the peanut butter and penicillin smeared on my jacket this morning.

You know, I really don't think the country is hurt by the absence of this particular congressperson.