You know, a weird thought just occurred to me: maybe, and hear me out on this one, but maybe they take high school football too seriously in Texas.

I went to a funeral for a teenager and the service sheet was written in Comic Sans.

This is a former governor and Fox television host. He’s not making some crazy rant on the internet. He is the Republican party. He is not a moron. He is a cruel, calculating man in a position of power.

Well if you pay them enough sex workers will say anything, Senator.

OK so the Washington Post does a thing every year where they have a Peep diorama contest, enjoy

i think the major thing I learned from this whole fiasco is how many smug people take pleasure in being assholes to starbucks employees/baristas

That was an amusing read...now, back to the real world...

Hmmm

I worked in doctors office. I collected the paper that held the diagnoses for you after you saw the doctor as well as your co-pay. When I told a guy his copay was 10 dollars, he gave me a "bill" and told me to keep the change and basically bolted out.

You can stop now, Midwestern Christians are not an oppressed group.

Well I didn't know so many illiterate Conservative Fucktards knew how to spell "Progressive", so I guess we both learned something today.

Oh, no, what if you went to Target? She'd never find you again!

My friend and I called Poison Control trying to identify a pill, hoping it would be something that would get us high. They really don't want to give you information on identifying pills unless somebody has ingested one and is having an obvious negative reaction. So my friend, let's call him Jake, was like "Yes, I've…

Ok can someone explain to me how MRAs are not like white supremacists? White supremacists believe that minorities are secretly in control of the government and that white people are the ones who are really oppressed. MRAs believe that a rad-fem agenda is secretly in control of the government and that men are really…

I showed up with brown skin. But it's ok, now. As it turns out, I outlived MCI/Worldcom—so there.

"I love it when you can open jars."