This is even baffling from a purely profit-related standpoint. I do not work in finance but I do know of something called Goodwill Asset Accounting. It basically is the estimated value of your brand. For instance, if I were to buy the Coca-Cola corporation, I get a lot more than soda factories and cans and employees —…

Perfect.

In a combined scenario, KITT becomes sentient and rampages through the world on an unstoppable path of destruction and sweet 80's tunes

I always had a sneaking suspicion Tomsula was a redneck golem

When I was in middle school we had a chorus recital. Before we went on, our teacher told us to make sure we don’t lock our knees to keep from fainting (a common problem). Immediately my friends and I decided I should fake faint and cause a scene. During the middle of a song I willfully toppled over like a tree that…

But he does get laughed at for his shoes

That was the point

You’re the puppet.

Good point. But I think Cubs just have a larger fanbase and it’s more identifiable for viewers. It’s an interesting take, just offering another viewpoint.

Or maybe a lot of movies reference the Cubs because Chicago is the third largest city in the country and a lot of these movies take place there? I don’t think they wrote Ferris Bueller or the Blues Brothers in Chicago just because they wanted to make them Cubs fans.

Someone’s a little salty that they didn’t get a job at the New York Times.

Damn it, why’d you have to spoil The Witch! I was just about to watch that!

Said shopper is clearly someone sitting on their bed that weighs 400 pounds.

You should apply for a job as the copywriter for their online store.

No more lip or he’s going to pull the car over!

What’s the worst/weirdest question you’ve ever been asked on one of these?

Glad to see Dak taking a cue from the Butabi brothers

That Nate Bronze line must have been burning a hole in your back pocket.

Going to a Buffalo Bills game has truly and unironically become a major item on my bucket list.