Good game. Great ending.

I heard that Dennis Schröder’s mom was so fat that when she jumped, she got stuck. And when she sat around the house, she really sat around the house. And that her armpits were so hairy, it looked like she had Buckwheat in a headlock. That’s what I heard.

When asked for further clarification, Thomas said he both did and did not talk about Schrödinger’s mom.

Asked for comment, Schroder’s mother stated, “Mwah mwah wah, wah mwah wah mwaaaah.”

Hope he’s okay. Rodney’s one of those under the radar guys who don’t get no respect.

I wonder if beating up trees makes her poplar at school. Hey, I’m just ashing questions.

Doesn’t anybody know that the best way to make sure you do not get pregnant after sex is to throw yourself down a flight of stairs immediately afterwards?

The ol’ Okra Poke-ra...

Nah man, Garza ain’t ruinin’ my gig.

Because soundbytes and straw man arguments are so much more personally satisfying.

Also, with apologies for commenting twice on this post, why do these sanctimonious twits have to add the only part after abstinence education? Plain-old abstinence education is a good idea! No one - literally no one - thinks it’s a bad idea to point out to kids that they may not be ready for the physical and…

“Oh, is it? How about fuck you!”
- The Blessed Virgin Mary

Hes probably one of those guys who had a mustache in the fifth grade and brought tomato soup to lunch in a thermos.

I don’t know, gang, but at the risk of being in the minority on this one, I am pretty sure I agree that no one should be having sex with Matt Garza or Bristol Palin.

Man, those abstinence only people really have a quiverfull of arrows ready to shoot at liberals.

one look at that facial hair tells me everything i need to know about his opinions

When we got into fistfights in high school, our principal had a unique punishment- the offending parties would have to stand up in front of the lunch room, holding hands for the entire time.

he yelled, “I used to fuck guys like you in prison,”

I haven’t seen a pissing contest involving somebody with a prosthetic leg this hotly contested since Paul McCartney’s divorce.

yeah, i’d have been pissed, but i’d find a way to shake it off.