Shut the fuck up, Perry!

I’m down with drive by catapaultings of inexpensive Chinese takeout. Makes it fun. 

I heartily second ditching priceless menus. And can we ditch the ones that technically have prices, but the format of how its displayed is confusing. Learn to use a fucking dollar symbol you pretentious shits!

Yep. Western NC is pretty much dominated by Food Lion, Aldi, Walmart, with some Ingles and other mid size chains thrown in. There may be some Krogers on the eastern part of the state, but besides that the nearest one to me is across state lines. Publix is trying to break into NC but is limited to larger cities right…

Out of curiosity, is gaijin used to refer to anyone non-Japanese? Or just Americans. 

Unless this dude has hermetically sealed his restaurant and is running blood tests for the virus on all customers coming in, this ain’t going to do shit to prevent possible exposure to Coronavirus.

I’m not a fan of clowns in general but oddly enough, Ronald never creeped me out. Maybe it was just residual goodwill from my childhood when going to McDonalds was still something that came across as a once and a while treat to be looked forward to. (I know, I know, but we’re talking late 80's/early 90's when, even as…

I have a similar experience, except with bread. I worked for what is now Bimbo bakeries years ago when I was in college, during summer break (Used to be SunBeam. At the time I worked for them it was Earthgrains, before getting bought out by Sara Lee, which then got gobbled up by Bimbo). Like you, we’d just shut down a…

Yep. Everyone raves about Krogers and I wish i had them in my area. A looooong time ago when I was a kid, there was one near where I lived but it shut down way back in the 90's. 

Honestly, 9 times out of 10, I’m going for the store brand on just about any given item. Most store brands, in my experience, tend to be at least 30% or more cheaper than the name brand, and with a handful of exceptions, there isn’t much of a difference in taste or quality.

I mean, this is a company that came up with the dead-eyed creepy horror of the King, and the dumb-ass promotion of the ‘Upside down Whopper’ for Stranger Things. Advertising prowess has never seemed to been a strong suit of theirs. I think they peaked promotionally with the idea to give out paper crowns. 

I’m not in the add business, but just off the top of my head, I would have gone with a montage of beef being freshly ground and formed into patties. That gets the message across (no preservatives, fresh, etc.) without the gross out factor. Maybe for an encore, they’ll do a timelapse of a person eating a Whopper and…

Absolutely my first thought upon learning of this. I mean, i suppose it counts as a win, as watching that video won’t make me want to eat anything for a while I guess. 

Yes on the salmon cakes. If made well and seasoned properly they’re awesome. They’re great to eat by themselves or make for a killer sandwich (and I might recommend doing a sort of quick and dirty sauce for it with some mayo, Old Bay and lemon juice).

SPAM may not be good for you, but damn if its not great when fried. I still hear that little jingle in my head (“Spam-burger Hamburger”) any time I look at a can. 

That seems to be my overall take on plant based alternatives to traditional animal based products. The better ones are pretty tasty in their own right but I have yet to see any that are an absolute 1-1 substitute for the real deal. I’ve had Beyond and Impossible burgers both, and I prefer Beyond myself (it edges out…

What brands of margarine contain animal products?

I honestly can’t remember where I read it, but I do remember reading a rather interesting history of the butter vs. margarine war. And it really extends back even further than the 90's. At one point, margarine was a very pale white and they had yellow food coloring capsules that you would break open and mix with it to…

Eh. I’m not really here for the ‘kids these days’ line on this. I will say that this is, like most things that start out on the market but benefit disabled folks, sort of an unintentional boon for the extremely disabled who may have problems physically getting out of their house but still want to be able to enjoy food…

You just made your kitchen very sad...