Holy shit, I thought the line about regulating how often they get to pummel their lil’ Hitlers was a joke!

I supposed where I fall on this is going to depend on the dynamic that has been going on. If the rest of the family has simply expected this person to buy and cook Christmas dinner on their own as a matter of course, then I am going to be more sympathetic. That being said, there were perhaps a few missed steps in…

It’s a deathtrap!!!

Given the propensity for long-distance runners to get diarrhea and shit themselves, this just seems like throwing gasoline on the fire...

*as he gets dragged away*

Words just can’t...

“So glad I ran into you, have you heard the good news about our lord and Savior Cthulu?...”

Me and my $2 bottle of gas station, sugary-as-hell, electric blue Boone’s Farm are not impressed...

I’ll see that and raise you this:

As people call each other all across Hamburg, and say to each other tearily: “Wake the kids! It’s finally happening at long last!”

Counterpoint: cranberry sauce is kinda gross. Cranberry relish is where it’s truly at.

I mean, if your gathering is sufficiently big enough you’re probably going to have to spill over into additional tables out of sheer necessity. My parent’s table comfortably seats 6 people and as of right now we’re looking at my parents, my sister and her husband and my wife and me, but if a few other family members…

Here we see a horse’s ass... and the backside of a Clydesdale!

New Takeout feature: Ask a celebrity how to pronounce croissant and if they start in with that ‘kwa-saaah’ nonsense, you slap the ever loving shit out of them.

The Canadian remake of Bonnie and Clyde is very lacking IMO...

Sometimes adopting from a shelter really backfires on you...

Credence is only a good name if its followed by Clearwater Revival. fight me.

The sad fact is, that based on the info that the government did actually have, 9/11 could have plausibly been stopped. Or at the very least, some of it could have been contained. But Trump is still a fucking fool of the highest order.

Lunch-styles of the Rich and Lazy.

Putting the ‘Culp’ back in ‘culpable’.