The second the wheels leave the runway I’m standing in the aisle like a ski jumper

I do the exact opposite; I stand up as soon as the plane takes off

I never knew how to interpret his reaction. I couldn’t tell if it was “you wouldn’t understand”, “I’m burdened with this knowledge, and I don’t want to burden you with it”, “I promised I wouldn’t say what we talked about”, or “some fucked up stuff is gonna happen to you, and you don’t need to know”.

THAT NOID STORY!!!!

seriously. also, the whole “I usually do my makeup in the rearview and drive too fast on my way to work, BUT I SWEAR I WASN’T DOING IT THAT DAY!!!”

Every Sunday when I was a kid my dad would take my brothers, sister, and me to visit my great grandfather who lived alone in this kinda secluded area. My great grandfather was from Ireland and was super Catholic, and Irish Catholicism is all mystical and superstitious and spooky. Well when we’d get there, my dad and…

I was staying with a friend who owned a house once when I was between apartments and she had a mimicking ghost. My first weekend staying there she was out of town and left a key for me under the mat and instructions on how to take care of her cats (she had a dog, too, but it was with her) so I let myself in and…

I liked the one where this young girl befriended an old woman and would visit her at her home and stuff and one day the old woman’s like “I really need you to visit me tomorrow. please don’t forget, it’s very important” but the girl’s school friend had tickets for them to go to some concert that day, so she blew her…

This is 10000000% the right take. The George W Bush redemption tour is all part of the Republican party’s efforts to lower the collective bar, making us all wistful for, and wishing to return to, a simpler past THAT NEVER EXISTED because it SEEMS better than the present. Forget substantial improvement! The future’s…

“I don’t remember hearing you LIBS complaining when FDR served FOUR terms as president!!!11! Fucking HYPOCRITES11!!!11!! "

I suggest this to everyone regardless of the conversation we are having. 

Is that his cousin's name?

I couldn’t quite put my finger on who your response to my initial post reminded me of, but I just figured it out: Kellyanne Conway. That was some Kellyanne style mental gymnastics. Even though I never said you were”wrong”, I merely stated my opinion, you twisted yourself in knots to be like “I’M NOT WRONG YOU’RE…

Plus, I never “disbarred” him of having a mental disorder, and couldn’t if I tried. My point is, by attributing his actions to a mental disorder, YOU ARE ABSOLVING HIM. It also leaves us unprepared for the next trump because we think he’s an anomaly and not the direct result of American culture. He knows what he’s…

Seriously, what? If you feel attacked by another person’s perspective, that’s on you. Maybe you’re not all that different from trumpy boy.

If you’ve ever met an intellectually disabled person, you would see how inaccurate it would be to compare trump to them. Some of the most open, honest, accepting, and loving people you could ever meet are non-neurotypical.

Responded to the wrong person

At the time it was verrrrry east Ohio. Right on the border. Spent a lot of time in the Sharon/Hermitage area though

The girl I dated in high school was working at the Joy ice cream cone factory (a job I envied then and still envy now) when we broke up, and afterwards I couldn’t eat ice cream cones for a while without getting that heavy chest feeling. My sappy teenage brain would think "DID SHE MAKE THIS ONE????" Didn’t ruin them…

*said in a stupid idiot’s voice*