I managed to avoid those, but I pee whenever I sneeze. It’s been 19 years.

Yeah I’ll probably be wearing a bikini (or at least a top with board shorts) when I’m 85 because I just prefer them and idgaf if my stomach isn’t flat. And I’ve been publicly topless. But if you told me I HAD to? Hell to the no. I burn easy and I’m gonna cover up when I want to.

The implication being it’s “immoral” to wear too many clothes. Well, that’s a new one, anyway.

I keep meaning to check if my local clinic needs escorts. Probably not, because Seattle, but you never know. We’ve got some whackos.

Same. I am not sure I personally could ever go through with an abortion, even though at 43 I really REALLY do not want another kid (I got one to adulthood! I don’t want to start over!) But everyone who wants an abortion should be able to get as many as they like.

Sadly I was much more timid in my 20's and I was too embarrassed to even look up from my shoes.

I’ve been accosted while just going for a pap smear. “We have alternatives!” To a pap smear? Because I would totally want to hear those.

We had to buy him some new shoes last week, because his old pair of not-quite sneakers wore out. So he got an almost identical pair, which was apparently too confusing because he actually went to work the next day in one new shoe and one old shoe. He was limping when he came home.

Enigma’s first album. We all had sex to that during the 90's, don’t lie.

This is my husband. He owns 1 pair of shoes he wears every day, one pair of dress shoes, an ancient pair of Doc Marten’s he’s had for probably 20 years, and some Ugg boots he got as a gift. The last two almost never get worn.

Me too. I actually do not need to work, and so I do volunteer docent stuff, but I’d honestly like a regular job. Part-time would be fine. A chance to put on adult clothes and get out of the house regularly.

I have a lot of curly hair that is nearly impossible to comb out, so when my daughter got lice and I didn’t know if she’d passed them to me, I dyed my hair. I figured they’re not gonna survive a couple boxes of drugstore Loreal.

My daughter had one year where she just kept getting them over and over. The shampoos weren’t doing anything. The only thing that worked was to cover her head in conditioner (to slow the buggers down) and then carefully comb out. It usually took 2 or 3 days of repeating this to get everything.

Like that is SO MUCH RED LIPSTICK Elizabeth you harlot.

Well in that case, I hate her stupid non-period-accurate hair and too much makeup. ;)

Elizabeth has her moments, but she’s kind of too repressed to do anything about them. She’d have done better as Ross’ wife than that other snotty bitch that wanted to marry him, though. The first time she had to pick a weed she’d probably have fainted for a week.

And of course if you say “use the restroom of the gender on your birth certificate”, it doesn’t solve anything because then a dude can just claim he was born female and walk in there looking as manly as he likes. No one’s carrying around a birth certificate regularly.

Katie Ledecky apparently outswims men training next to her regularly.

I suppose they could come in perpendicular to the plane of the ecliptic. That’d probably confuse the heck out of us.

Seriously, I would like to see a story where aliens have nice, polite first-contact protocols. Like “We contact them from the next orbit over and politely request permission to enter planetary proximity.” Why do they always just show up in our atmosphere? That’s like the pizza guy just strolling in and dropping a…