Yeah, I know in California you have to prove “abandonment” which is no contact for a significant amount of time. And my ex wanted to make sure he got every second of his visitation time, so that wasn’t going to happen.

Good, and since his name and picture is all over the article, his kids can finally get some money.

In California, if you lose your job you can get relief from payments as long as you’re filing paperwork about job searches with the DCSS. They won’t press you for payment if you’re actually unemployed and you notify them.

I’ve heard it as “you can’t squeeze blood from a turnip”. Which is why my ex is listed in my phone as “The Turnip.”

It is SO HARD to actually get someone jailed or have their license revoked, though. Almost any token payment will reset the clock, as it were. I’ve been fighting with my ex over support for 15 years now, and every time I start contempt of court proceedings he comes up with some paperwork or just enough money to derail…

Oh god, I know it’s SO FRUSTRATING. Because it seems to take forever for there to be any real consequences. And 6 months later you have to start it all over again. And it’s so exhausting trying to do the right thing when your ex is a master of evading consequences.

My daughter’s 18 now and only needs her own consent to adoption. So her stepdad will be adopting her shortly. My ex is gonna lose his shit over this even though he hasn’t talked to his daughter in almost a year.

lol my ex always tries to say that he TRIED to call but his daughter never answers the phone. I’m like “you know I can look at cellphone records online, right?”

My daughter’s lived with her stepfather for 13 years. We lived with her father for two. Who’s her dad? Uhhh I’m gonna say the guy that actually knows what the hell is happening in her life.

... wow I need to take more ASL classes.

Yeah, they’ve threatened to suspend my ex’s license a dozen times, but he’s never lost it because he’ll manage to cough up some token amount every time they catch up to him. He’ll stall until the deadline for every penalty and then show up with the “oh look I applied to 7 jobs this week” paperwork or $200 in hand and…

Heh, yeah I didn’t take my case to DCSS until oh ... the 5th or 6th check in a row bounced. Fine, dude, I gave you enough chances to pay this on your own, now we get the DA involved.

Mr. Bells and I went out for breakfast afterward and I laughed into my pancakes until I cried.

I know you can do that, but you have to prove abandonment. I’m not sure if the rules are the same everywhere but for me I was told there had to be no contact and no support. And Exhole was all over making sure he got every second of his custody rights so I couldn’t terminate even though he didn’t pay.

haha my ex was SO MAD when he found out I was finally dating again and HOW could I not tell him!? Of course, he’d probably had his new girlfriend about 30 seconds after we separated ... if not before.

My ex advertises himself as having a professional license (not driving, the other kind) that I know he doesn’t have, because California suspends all professional licenses when you’re in arrears. Yeah, he probably could make more money with the license, but I wouldn’t see it anyway so I’ll take the cheap vindication.

It was honestly hilarious. I have never seen the expression “give him enough rope to hang himself” play out so dramatically. I said NOTHING for 20 minutes while he sob-storied at the judge. When the judge finally asked me I said all I cared about was the arrears and would accept any current amount. So he said “Will…

My ex owes 30k, and he’s supposed to provide health insurance and pay 50% of her medical expenses. He’s never done those last two.

I think it’s hilarious that so many science fiction and fantasy authors’ websites look like they made them in 1990 when the internet was still new and then ... never changed them. George R R Martin, Lois McMaster Bujold, Connie Willis, etc.

This happened to my daughter at her very first job. The manager was like “Oh I’m sure Joe wouldn’t have sent her a dick pic! He goes to CHURCH!” I’m like, so do Catholic priests, lady.