I don’t think I was a flower girl. I’m not even actually sure it was a wedding; one of my other aunts thinks it was but I don’t remember anything other than how much I loved that itchy-as-fuck polyester dress.

I’d like to have one really nice bag, but otherwise I tend to think most designer bags are just ugly. I’d splurge on one nice Kate Spade and call it a day.

I passed a pickup truck on the freeway once, just seconds before the queen-size mattress he was carrying flew out of the truck bed. Somehow everyone behind me avoided an accident.

About 10 years ago, someone in my mother’s area lost a horse trailer on the freeway. The horse got out of the trailer, two cars dodged it, the third did not. The driver was decapitated. The horse also did not survive.

jesus christ i just noticed it in the back seat

I was only a wee Bells in the 70's, but I do have this glorious fashion moment from my aunt’s wedding immortalized:

I’m upset that they’re dressed like Captain America’s backup USO dancers!

I’m offended and amused by the implied “trick your wife into seeing Deadpool” all at the same time.

I’m going for WW and Aquaman. Yeah, suck it haters, I love Aquaman.

Trump is 69. Just saying.

I think I would go just because it’s the weirdest looking church building ever.

“Maintenance sex” in a relationship, I think, is a different thing. It’s definitely a gray area.

He responded, “Well some women are into being dominated. Don’t me so close-minded.”

Those books are hilarious. The dialogue between the two Stromtroopers set to guard the Falcon in Verily, A New Hope - I could not stop giggling.

I had a guy try to follow me into the restroom at a club, after I’d turned down his offer of a drink. A bouncer saw him following me and caught him just inside the door. I’ve never understood the idea that trans women are just “dressing up” to grope us in bathrooms - there’s no reason a dude just can’t waltz in there…

I’m thinking of John Landis, talking about An American Werewolf in London: “I wanted it to be funny, it’s meant to be funny, but it’s not a comedy! It’s a straight line to death!”

Ohhh I see what you’re saying. Nah, I didn’t mean it that way - my very best friend and I disagree on books and movies like that all the time. I mean, she thinks Blade Runner is better WITH the voiceover! I feel like I’m more out of step with the rest of humanity sometimes, rather than more insightful.

My beloved doll had a stuffed body, which split along the front seam. She now has a scar to match mine down the center of her chest.

LOL I haven’t even been drinking tonight. Clearly it’s past my bedtime.