Yup. I grew up on the SoCal charbroiled burger joint style, and to this day prefer a grilled burger to any griddled one. 

Nothing wrong with a grilled pineapple teriyaki burger.

Interesting theory, and it you want to explore the limits of classical burger theory you would get into the relativistic merits of charbroiling/flamebroiling/grilling/griddling/steaming. 

It me; I am Ariana Grande.

Hey, at least I didn’t go full A/V Club. My apologies.

Or better yet:

That’s what I get for just reading the URL and not clicking on it. Never mind.

Animal studies are the preliminary studies done prior to human subject research. Because, you know, you have to test your hypothesis before you can experiment on humans. These are also specially bred lab mice that contain human tissue (or organs in some cases) not some rat from PetSmart. It’s not junk science because…

Trump = Fistful of TicTacs in his Diet Coke.

Trump = Fistful of TicTacs in his Diet Coke.

I guess compared to Philly, Chicago is an upgrade. 

“Angela, baby, listen. I know we haven’t seen eye-to-eye, but we can cut a deal, right? I heard you have a bunch empty camps you aren’t using and I’ve got a buncha Mexican kids...hello? Angela?”

Look, you don’t want to mix them up, okay? Trust me.

My job won’t provide paper plates, so I use them as paper...plates.

What’s so great about Chicago, then?

This is something, I tell you. And I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. I’ve seen Original Tommy’s chili congealing on an In-n-Out Double-Double Animal Style. I’ve seen KFC spicy popcorn chicken scattered on a Hawaiian pizza from Pizza Hut. I’ve seen a Chik-Fil-A sandwich made with Krispy Kreme donuts. All of…

So much fast food and not enough coronaries.

No love for the Jack In The Box grease taco? Nothing is more fulfilling than a grease taco after a night of snorting lines. It’s like the final stare into the abyss as you jump off the cliff, for a moment you’re frozen in eternity—-immortal. Then it hits your stomach and the purge of all the night’s toxins begins.…

Nachos, obviously. It’s the Mexican French fry, that’s, uh, Mexican.

This is the only correct alternative. Anyone who answered otherwise is living a lie that will one day implode on itself and they’ll wake up alone, covered in sweat, staring at death in the mirror.