I don’t know what you need more, a spine or a map. 

Unless the Illuminati squash it.

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas.

Boyle Heights not gentrified enough for you, snowflake? 

*Reads the fine print.*

“Birth of Penus.”

Yeah, here’s something White allies can do. Put their cameras where there mouth is and start challenging these laws state by state until it reaches the Supreme Court and...oh, damn.

Yes, whatever the militias do would be asymmetrical warfare and it would be in urban areas. Then you’d get your “lonewolf” attacks from the gunfuckers too crazy to be part of any militia (that’s saying something right there).

Yeah, I still remember the two times Obama lost in massive landslides to Republicans. 

He’s been in witness protection for testifying against the NYPD (after they tried to blow him up).

Think we found one half of the Dem ticket, folks.

Did she say “funnier” or “more homophobic”? Because that’s the only comparison to be made between the two. Comedy-wise, they ain’t even on the same level, even if you put two Kevin Harts under the same trench coat.

Takis are the new Flaming Colon Cheetos.

A large swath of this country is just real white trash, and electing guys like King and Trump is like rolling coal, fucking their guns in public, or wearing matching XXXXL ’murrican flag thong bikinis to Walmart: just real attention-seeking behavior.

Jenny from the vote block.

They certainly don’t need to all up in my Starbucks at 7am when I’M TRYNA GET MY COFFEE. 

PUT THE FRIES IN THE GODDAM BURGER YA MORON.

He made a callback joke about it, so probably.

Sounds like you live in a city with a responsive and serviceable police department; I wonder how much kickback the cops get from the tow companies?

The irony is that Portland PB wont even respond quickly to real emergencies so the fuxk she was expecting them to show up for a parking ticket.