It’s his good luck milk that he probably was drinking when the Dodgers one their one game. That’s the problem with a good luck charm, you can’t choose them; they choose you.

You know why you have to always explain things to the Whites? Because they have the short term memory of dogs (which is a few minutes, tops), and they’re not giving any space in their long-term memory to anything that doesn’t involve Confederate flags, pumpkin spice products, and the stats of the 2012 Minnesota…

You just described how my lexapro works. 

What percentage of the sales were rwnj’s buying these to destroy them in protest?

It’s basically this in grayscale:

Not gonna lie, I’d rather have the 1.537 BN.

Use a smaller chicken. 

They All Look The Same: The Statue

Someone gets it

Now I can have an ass pocket full of wine.

The real story here is that there is still a Barnes & Noble in existence. That’s gotta be some super off-brand pumpkin spice, man.

See, White folks, it can happen to you, too.

A hot dog is a sausage sandwich, and we know that deep down.

We used to get the 36" pie for football games back in the day, and it was good party pizza, better than every other delivery place, but nothing spectacular except for the size of it. The real find at this place is their kachapouri (which I see they now call the “egg gondola pizza” lol).

This is also the answer to #3.

Exactly.

You’ve never had them at Old West Cinnamon Rolls in Pismo Beach then, have you? They are amazing, but the carrot cake is even better.

Nah, I’m doing right now and typing this on my phone.

Sonny Bono died in 98 and three husbands later she’s still keeping his name because she ain’t shit otherwise.

Meh.