That headline read to me like "Leprechauns Brush Fairy Dust Out of Unicorn Manes for Orphan Charity." So much awesome in one sentence.

Someone please tell me Luther is worth continuing to watch. I love Idris but was not taken in with Luther after episode one.

I'm sure you're fun at birthday partiiii... HEY WAITAMINUTE.

Today's my due date - no sign of baby yet - but you're making me feel like shit for having sex in April.

It can not be overstated that every major company we deal with on a regular basis has glaring security flaws. It's important for companies to feel the PR burn from an incident but less realistic to boycott them because of it. The Payment Card Industry Data Security Standard (PCI DSS), while currently still largely…

Favorite sports movie; try not to all shout Air Bud at once.

I would not let your ass back into bed. Wash yer damn hands.

I think my man's dehydrated cuz his shit sticks to my tummy like someone through paste at me. On the plus side it must be highly concentrated as he all sorts of knocked me up.

Daddy-provided anti-sex jewelry. There's no possible way this could lead to an experimental period in college where Princess lays sexual waste to the masses of genitalia of her choosing.

And that's why it took 2 months longer of CrossFit than Brittany, that skinny bitch across the hall, for Stella to get her groove back.

I started crying at the minute mark from laughing.

My gut feeling was that they were both found by Brittany's mother so... But I know how God awful that speculation is if untrue.

Who would have the most to benefit?

This shit's getting shadier and shadier. I feel like someone's going to go down for this if her father continues his pursuit.

I'm sure he'll kick an ASS or two, that's what Brian Boitano'd do.

Breeders: Anyone who says they just don't like kids has clearly forgotten what it's like to be a child. You didn't spawn into this dimension a fully formed asshole, you were a mini-asshole first. Asshole.

Another brilliant pivot away from the real story (Jesus is super white duh) by focusing on the part that doesn't matter. I couldn't give a fuck if Santa was a Haitian Voodoo witch doctor as long as that fat motherfucker brings me prezzies.

Holy shit! You go to Dr. Nick too???

SO FUCKING BORED WAITING FOR THIS BABY TO POP OUT. 9 days to go. Anxious for labor to start. It's like waiting for prom night without the amazing 90's hair and crushing disappointment.

Agreed. I was all ready to lay down some sass as I figured out my unplanned, much desired pregnancy at the 2-3 week mark (according to the blood test.) That kinda nail-in-the-coffin'ed my feelings about how obtuse you'd have to be to not realize. But LadySparrow's story reminds me that I'm not everyone else and…