The name of this feature is just so simple and perfect.

I think with the level of awfulness happening in the world, this merits little more than a bemused smile.

It seems like it would lead to lots of unnecessary fumbling down there, with a lot of wasted clitoral stimulation opportunity.

I mean, if you agreed to fuck Trump for his money (dry heave) then it stands to reason there’s pretty much nothing you wouldn’t do for a buck.

From my experience when dudes whine about not getting sex, they are actually whining about not getting sex from a CERTAIN TYPE of woman, i.e. women they consider hot.

I made darkest timeline moustaches for my bff and I.

The day my town declared my side of the street a no-parking zone I heard angels sing.

Yeah, tying my tubes seemed like a good idea at the time (no more paying for birth control! No more hormones!). In reality, meh.

Internet hugs, it can’t be easy to go through that.

Internet hugs, it can’t be easy to go through that.

A couple of my friends who are gay actually have them for lighter periods.

I actually kind of regret getting my tubes tied before trying an IUD. My friends with them barely get a period.

Trump’s next executive order will probably be to outlaw tampons and pads and exile the dirty women to menstrual tents designed by Ivanka.

Here’s to hoping all of my American Jezzie friends have their IUD’s locked and loaded.

I love Beyoncé. I just find the amazement of the posts funny. Beyoncé is a hard-working professional, of course she’d keep her commitments if she felt up to it.

I definitely come from the stock of women who would get out and plow the fields at 9 months pregnant.

I taught 5 periods of elementary school on my feet all day and hauled all my stock up 2 flights of stairs 6 times per day. Not exactly a desk job.

I find this breathless excitement about Beyoncé keeping her performance engagements hilarious. Most women work through their whole pregnancies. I worked till I was 8 1/2 months and the size of a bloated manatee.

Making banana bread. Like I’d waste the good stuff on them.

I blame garbage Thurston.