Road Warrior was the epitome of what a post-apocalyptic action movie could be, literally the acme of the genre.

That’s how science works, sometimes you get unexpectedly interesting results.

Can’t I have one fracking vice? I mean, I have lots ... erm, let’s try that again ...

Timothy Zahn made me a devoted fan of the EU. This trilogy completely cured me of that devotion. They cancel each other out.

So you’re saying that House of Cards IS the prequel to the Hunger Games?

I’m imagining this hoard as the end result of an ancient Roman version of “Fargo,” where Steve Buscemi in a toga buried the coins along some remote goat-herder’s path, fully intending to come back for them before being fed to lions or something like that.

I assume this was an ethical choice on their part? Like, you tried to feed them meat, but they placed a paw on your hand and said, “No human, we choose not to feast on the flesh of our fellow creatures.” Thus chastened, you found yourself questioning whether you actually wanted that strip of bacon after all ...

I’ll have you know that Chef Fluffy is a wizard in the kitchen and it would seriously imperil his chances of ever being on Kitchen Confidential (that’s a thing, right?) if he were to suddenly develop a phobia of cukes.

What’s wrong with Dickey?

Sounds to me like he’s worried people will like TFA better than the prequels. It’s kinda like seeing your ex, who you dumped but still kind of have feelings for, taking up with someone better and more interesting than you.

There are middle ground cases where the boss is fairly tolerant of sick days, but impressed by the “can-do spirit!” of those willing to work through sickness. It ends up being almost as bad as the places that don’t tolerate sick days at all, because anyone who wants to get ahead learns quickly that working sick is a…

The almighty dollar trumps all. Even if collecting that dollar today costs you ten dollars next week.

The “open office” is a degrading, useless plague on humanity.

Worst of all, after cat-snake marriage is finally legalized after decades of debate, there’ll be the risk of the snake-wifey coming home from a hard day’s work and finding the cat-hubby looking at pictures of cucumbers online.

Having the bejeesus scared out of you right after downing some Fancy Feast can’t be good for the digestion.

As a Mets fan, I pray that you spend the rest of your days having to hear people say “as a Mets fan.”

I worry about being alone if she goes first, or leaving her alone if I go first. If we could sign up for this kind of deal, we totally would.

Do we do a shot every time the Johnny Football clock ticks from “Time” to “Not Time”?

I don’t know how I’m going to choose which one to watch first. Might have to alternate episodes.

Dangit, now I’m a Senators fan. And I’ve never even been to Ottawa! This is so inconvenient.