Sooooo this process would work equally well on humans, right? Asking for a friend.

Yes it is - Jesus was allllll about washing people’s feet. They tried to play it off as him being extra-humble or whatever but c’mon. We all know what’s going on there.

Gay? Not this guy. He’s got animals on that hard drive of his.

Even $187K/year isn’t enough to make me wanna take a bullet for any of these people. ADD SOME MORE ZEROES (like, 10) and maybe we’ll talk.

This isn’t clever enough to be funny. C-

I want to star this but you currently have 666 stars and I can’t bring myself to mess it up.

Oh, wait - you mean this isn’t a Nickelback concert? MY BAD! I just... I saw all the white people and I just assumed.

This is the only non-video program that should EVER have been allowed to air on MTV.

So they were asking for it, you mean? This is a very bad take.

Aw, one of them is fun-size!

Yeah, your poop is gonna be weird either way.

I’ve heard peacocks are pretty aggressive. You could get one of those.

Black food as a novelty, fine. I can get behind a cake with black icing or maybe that ice cream up there but as an ongoing thing? Ugh, gross. Why? No!

My dog is part Husky (and part Border Collie, for added fun) and I am hearing this. She can run foreverrrrrr and never get tired, and the hair... the hair is just a part of our family now.

That is the best explanation for all of this that I have seen so far.

Does it work?

I’m taking a class in the fall called “The American Presidency.” I am SO SO SO SO SO SO EAGER to see how it will deal with... whatever this is.

Same. Dad is one of 10 and Mom is one of 9, so I’m not 100% sure how many first cousins I even have. Somewhere in the neighborhood of 45? I don’t know.

Soooooo what I’m hearing you say is “buy a replacement at Target.” Gotcha. :)

Does that sharpener work on serrated knives? I have never learned how or if serrated knives can be sharpened because I am lame.