That butt plug story reminds me of a young Helen Mirren.

Bbbbut the barrel scene! Interspecies flirting! Giant fucking wood spiders!

Ugh, there is NO making my mother happy.

Frosting has more integrity than your ex-boyfriend

Yay Jezebel is featuring another Akilah video! She is the best :)

"#MommaIMadeIt"

In SHIELD's defense, each episode sucks a little less than the last one.

Uh, she BEST not be naming her child Ravenia Devilsclaw, because that is MY baby name. Maleficent needs to step. off.

I used to work with dogs—I was thinking Great Pyr mixed with lab or golden. The faces look a little too square and the body shape a little too retriever. Or, ugh, maybe the trend for Goldens and yellow labs to be light has finally gone this far? Eta on second view (of course I watched it twice, puppies!!!) the tails…

Among those in discussion is my proposed Millenial revival of Pippin, wherein a young NYU Media Studies grad tries to find happiness in the Marines, Teach for America, ChatRoulette, Brooklyn chicken farming and the Knockout Game. Eventually he becomes a Reddit commenter named FistingMeSoftly and marries his assistant…

If at anytime some douche should make unsolicited comments about your body I have the BEST comeback. It's so simple.

Is dueling still a thing? BECAUSE I WOULD DUEL THE FUCK OUT OF YOU LINDY FOR TALKING SHIT ABOUT TENNIS. Pistols at dawn.

very quick - it's late and I have sewing to finish - but here's a snapshot from a costumer's point of view:

Oh Britney. I take back all the mean stuff I said when I was a teenager.

I'm just excited that she's at an Alvin Ailey event. Hooray, dance!

Wait for meeeeeeee!

"Sam Lutfi is a fucking ringwraith of friendship. SAM LUTFI WILL STAB YOUR EMOTIONS WITH A MORGUL BLADE."

Gadot... just who I've been waiting for :3

"A little thing that can turn into anything at anytime."

Hop on Loser, We're going Shopping!