I was today years old when I learned that Lee’s Famous has yet to break into the Chicago foodiverse. They’ve had fried pickles on their menu forever. Time for a roadtrip!

Here’s a complete list of the Fortune 1000 companies that have “gone broke” after “going woke”:

I think it’s pretty easy to draw a line between “hydraulic failure” and “brakes on one side don’t work right” and “skidded sideways off the runway”.

Username checks out.

It’s all about capital punishment in games journalism.

I was wondering whether the gender-free pronoun was Miller’s preferred choice, or whether AVClub had made an editorial decision to eliminate gender-specific terms. This clarifies it. Thanks!

“Why is the rum gone?”

Who wants to place bets on when King gets her own show on Netflix?

Ralph Wrecks the Universe

See, most of the time, your newer CPUs, they run out of binary fluid. Ya gotta refill ‘em or they start shuttin’ down.  Factory doesn’t fill ‘em all the way up so’s they can make more money selling the fluid separate.

Crypto (KRIP-toe): noun. Fiat, but on a computer.

Government so small you can drown it in the bathtub.  Or hang it from a tree.  Whatever gets the message across, really.

Please don’t go.  The drones need you.  They look up to you.

So many prosthetics... surely he could have invited Martin Short to bring along his own suitcase of latex bits?  I mean, don’t the over-the-hill Canadian funnymen have to stick together or something?  Isn’t that part of their universal health care?

He got along for a while as a cartoon troll.  What really killed him was trying to out-Carrey the Grinch with that big-hatted Cat.

Came 200,000 light years for this comment.  Leaving satisfied.

Brown! Brown brown brown brown brown brown brown. Brown brown brown? Brown brown!

Remember back in the 80s, when the debate on the playground was whether Prince or Michael Jackson would have the longer career?

If we’re gonna name a bunch of Wordlelikes, we can’t forget the one based on last names of hockey players:

Late night, 2005ish, driving from Kansas City to Springfield. Just before Clinton, I found an entire family of deer in my headlights; buck, doe, fawn, fawn, crossing in single file, taking up both lanes and both shoulders. I knew I wasn’t going to stop in time. I didn’t swerve; I laid on the horn and brakes while…