Doing this tomorrow. 

Holy shit there are going to be so many memes about this. There's going to be a movie. There's going to be long History Channel documentary series about this. Derek. 

No. 

Have you not? 

They could call it Coke Fiend. But they would need to make a Coke Fiend Zero. I'm trying to watch my sugar intake. 

Too soon. 

This one time when I was a kid my sister and I found this old board game. We started to get bit by mosquitos and couldn’t figure out what was going on, but we soon released it was because of the game that a bunch of monkeys had gotten loose in the house, causing all kinds of mayhem for us and the neighborhood. Things…

It really feels like a “thou doth protest too much” thing. Accuse your opponents of doing the thing that you are doing. What gets me is that they are the only ones still talking about Hillary. Wouldn’t surprise me if she wound up doing something shady (but not this Ukraine whatever) but honestly who gives a fuck? That…

Well, I was raised fairly carniverous, but I have a vegetarian wife. Broccoli has a flavor that’s hard to change, but I can do some stuff with cauliflower. My tacos are something. And I *hate* cauliflower as a “vegetable”.

I think the Tilted Kilt has been closed for a while :( (they had good long islands and great wings. Shut up) 

Finns is good

Euclid hall is good, but I feel like the atmosphere is a little millennial-chic and it drives me crazy. 

Can you eat then if they have been transformed? Cauliflower in potatoes? Broccoli cheese rice? 

I dated a few girls over the years who turned out to have eating disorders (I don’t know if that says anything about me, whatever), and as bad as society is about mental health in general boy does it just not get what happens when someone has a disordered relationship with food. I’m not sure it ever truly goes away.…

Uncle Ramen. Get it postmates’d to Jefferson Park Pub and relive one of my favorite Friday night chill activities from when I live there. Or if you want to drive/uber and get GOOD beer come to Cannonball Creek Brewery. I might actually meet you there if I am available.

Real men use shoestrings as emergency dental floss. 

If we are selling less cars because we are making better, longer-lasting cars will selling less cars mean we keep building better, longer-lasting cars? 

HOT TAKE ALERT: Caramel apples take delicious things and combine them in one of the worst ways possible. Give me a huge hunk of caramely candy and I am into it. Give a tasty, healthy apple, preferably chilled, awesome! Caramel apples are just an assault on your teeth and a slog to get through. PASS. 

Phrasing. 

Warren = Beth. Chelsea Clinton = Summer. Beto as Mr. Poopy Butthole?