Still less angry than Burneko.

I know Johnny Football is trying to distance himself from alcohol, but he needs some lessons on how to do that.

Nevermind you were right it was him.

Also check out the direction of everyone staring. Looks range from quizzical to “Dude WTF?!”

That dude was definitely his friend. Find him, you find the dude.

Yeah, that guy has a real “oh shit, bro!” look on his face. My bet is it’s his friend. Somebody is going to recognize that guy and know/find out who he was at the game with. And then they’re going to get $4.67 from Deadspin for his name.

Instead of training, they are hunting elusive giraffes.

Worker to student: “how you like them apples!!?”

Reminds me of the Christian Slater greats Pump Up the Valium and Gleaming the Rube.

Last night, the Giants didn’t complete a pass longer than 14 yards

Gee, I’m real sorry your mom blew up, Rickie.

How amazing it must be, living in a coastal city. In Chicago, where there is nothing and your only friend is the demonic avatar of winter riding a fixed gear bicycle, you’re lucky if you find an old broken acoustic guitar lying in a trash heap somewhere so you can pluck tuneless melodies next to a space heater until…

Never met a home brewer in Chicago??? You may want to get out a bit more and talk to people because you cannot throw a stone down a north side street without landing in someone’s home brew!!

Oh my, you had me at “loose Europeans!”

Referring to him as a “reverend” in the first sentence kinda makes you sound like a dick. He’s an ordained priest, not a storefront preacher.

You don’t want to talk about Tebow’s dong?

Funny, Adrian Peterson’s son’s face is imprinted on his cleats too.

“Jesus Christ. Why did no one laugh? It’s like Ground Gyro around here.”