Normally Texans fans are gasping when tasked with walking up a small flight of stairs.

Ugh. Snare line with match grip. The fucking worst.

Honestly they should be banned because they aren’t funny. California is the only state that has more investment in agriculture than Iowa. Iowa’s not the one inundating rest of the nation with ads about how happy their cows are.

This is offensive to shitheads everywhere.

the values of the Rose Bowl Game

I think they wanted examples from sports.

Attempts to recall a similar instance where a slightly-premature celebration was penalized are escaping us.

Jet fuel can’t heal sports hernia surgery

Excellent.

So basically this but less cylinders?

I see two answers, to solve two problems:

I found it!

This doesn’t have to be awful to drive. We need supercar class hydrostatic drive, and an accumulator. Then you can go down the road fairly smoothly with nice even torque.... With one giant piston and with straight pipes you can sound like you’re being propelled at 200+MPH by a fucking naval cannon.

I did, and my ears just died.

Somebody set the Torchinsky dial to “maximum”.

I just couldn’t help but think of this during the entire article. Hooray for supercars! (although the Beast of Turin was a racecar)

And the currency is called Dong! $1 is roughly equivalent to 20,000 Dong. If you go outside right now and ask how much Dong someone will give you for $1 I bet it won’t be 20,000.

I, too, look forward to Ed Hochuli’s CYA explanations in the playoffs....

“On the play, number 97 from the defense attempted to pay his mortgage bill with funds from a 401(k) without submitting a W-8 to specify how much he wanted to withhold. At the same time, number 24 from the defense returned a videotape to…

Mock Jim Tomsula ALL you want. Dude had his contract paid off when he was fired. He made $14-million for coaching one miserable year of football. Do you know how much Costco instant mashed potatoes $14-million buys? Jim Tomsula does!

When in doubt, pull it out.