Ever read something and been unsure whether it’s a typo or a genius pun that flew right over your head?

You should probably cool off and realize that every generation has done this to the ones that came after it. It’s just an Old Person Thing, without regard to logic or reality.

He and Rob Lowe were hatched from the same freaky alien creche.

You lost me at Kenny G :[

You should try the syrup at least. Cinnamon syrup is awesome in an old-fashioned.

They’re pretty niche. But finding a drink that you want to make is a good way to procure and learn about new sprits.

Does this entire article not exaggerate for effect? Even if you assume sad, tiny lamb rib chops and little English bangers, that’s still a pretty decent amount of fatty meats for a single human. I’d put it all away without issue but would be assured of some side-eye from my wife.

Chicken livers aren’t so bad! You can soak them in milk to, ahem, “rinse” them and mild the flavor. They make a pretty decent pate.

In a rare show of bipartisan cooperation, Christie’s remarks were based on an earlier, rejected draft of Obama’s speech at the White House Correspondents’ Dinner.

the officer who was supposed to investigate the case *also* got arrested for child pornography

It sounds like quite a charming little shitheap. Ever thought about taking up arson as a hobby?

#1: Exactly. This is so puerile as to be more baffling than offensive. Step up the maturity level and scrawl a dick on the box in crayon if you want some lulz.

Jesus christ. I’ve been reading about Congress and murders all day but this post and comment thread are easily the most depressing. Damn, Jolie.

Mushroom duxelles:

I don’t get at all why people automatically assume that this is at all sexual! That dude’s hair is like a billboard that says “I like to be weird to mess with you.”

“Airplanes Are The Best Places to Do All The Drugs, You Guys”

You guys need a new list gag! Pretty sure “getting hit by a bus” has been in at least the last 5.

Oh! Or female, obviously. Or poor. Or gay - except, wait, that one’s a choice, right?

Only if they’re the wrong color.

He doesn’t hate women. His god hates women and he’ll come get us all if we quit ignoring him.