Director of Communications, Lizard People Confederation

10/14/19

I’d like to start a petition.. if the Dolphins go 0-16 then we no longer have to witness the 1972 Dolphins celebrate when the last undefeated team losses... watching them celebrate is insufferable.

10/7/19

That’s not so mean when you remember it’s Lane Kiffin.

10/7/19

Kind of unprofessional not to do it first thing in the morning, and instead wait until he was two hours into eating tape.

10/1/19

Endorsements help educate consumers, and sham endorsements short circuit that process. For example, I was once a State Farm customer, because family is important to me and it came through how important family was to the Paul twins (Chris and Cliff). But I switched to Nationwide because I value creativity, and the…

9/30/19

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fOfIObhGMe0

9/30/19

I definitely don't pity him. Him gleefully doing a heel routine on his way out after legitimately trying to injure someone has me rooting for the CTE

9/29/19

I'm no political scientologist, but I talked to a guy who OWNS A BRIEFCASE and he said all of this could have TOTALLY HAPPENED.

9/29/19

Many people are saying that the reason Jim Jordan helped cover up sexual abuse in the wrestling program at Ohio State is because he participated in that abuse. I don’t know anything about it, but it is something many people are saying, that Jim Jordan committed numerous acts of sexual abuse at Ohio State. I don’t…

9/27/19

Like maybe they’d be the son of a famous admiral. A decorated fighter pilot who served in combat and become a heroic prisoner of war. That sort of thing.

9/27/19

Whatabout whatabout whatabout whatabout ....

9/27/19

Trump has been committing impeachable offenses since before he was even elected.

9/27/19