"Throw"

"I would have been there for the cut-off." ~ Manny Ramirez

Reports are surfacing that upon being arrested, Knoblauch threw a fit. Unfortunately, it hit an elderly woman in the third row.

I think the horrible use of contractions is the worst part of that song.

There's a two game suspension joke here somewhere but I just don't have the heart.

Police found the woman tucked under a desk, barefoot and crying.

"Oh, she wasn't just pretending"

I really think every Ray Rice story should end with, "And Josh Gordon is facing a 16-game suspension for smoking weed."

The lesson being that dog's lives are worth more than women's.

Delete your Kinja.

Were you pretend managing the Red Sox too?

Because women always get out of their abusive relationships? Totally!

omg totally agree, women never marry their abusers that's why the word "wifebeater" is so wierd

You're a real piece of shit.

[Ray and Janay Rice walk into the commissioners office to find Goodell sitting in a large ornate chair]

Well, he's certainly drawn their interest with his flatulence, but the Rockies won't trade for Lee until they know he can completely shit the bed.

more like Astro-not, amirite

Right, because there's no round-the-clock, year-round coverage of NFL teams from local and national media outlets already. "Distractions" is always a code word for "things that don't feel quite right but I'd called out for being a dick if I didn't talk in dog whistles".

That's a black man in the US saying that Sam shouldn't have a chance because it wouldn't be smooth.

After reaching first base, Pujols fired an imaginary arrow at Hamilton, which struck him in the chest and put him on the 60 day DL