P85D, because I hate the speedo in the center screen that damn much.

I’ve had my non-Performance Model 3 since January (and truly, honestly believe that there is no better daily driver for my purposes than a Model 3 with Autopilot), and while I intellectually know that upgrading already would be the equivalent of pouring gasoline on a basket full of $100 bills and throwing in a match,…

Sometimes I forget that George Soros is a real person and not a liberal bogeyman who only appears when you say his name in parenthesis three times. 

FUN FACT: Remember when Bill Maher lost his show on ABC for stating  the 9/11 terrorists did not act in a cowardly manner (in rebuttal to President Bush’s statement calling them cowards) but instead were brave to stay on the plane...........he was agreeing with his guest- none other than future felon and inveterate…

Exactly. If the election comes down to a candidate that’s kind of ok-ish and another that’s diametrically opposed to everything you care about, and you take your ball and go home because neither is what you really, really wanted...that leaves you with precisely *zero* room to bitch when the candidate that hates your…

Evergreen trees

See also: Toys R Us. 

Every Dave Chappelle joke is becoming prescient.

California was the first state to really limit emissions and require fuel efficiency, so when the Clean Air Act, and act of Congress passed by Nixon, CA was granted an exemption from the general rule that states can’t pass different standards. In part, this was due to politics, but it was also due to the fact that CA,…

It’s slightly disturbing, even to me, how much I enjoyed this particular episode of Fancy Kristen.

Guess a movie doesn’t begin at conception either.

I think, and I may have missed a talking point or two, the gist of it is this:

Me: [google’s murder/suicide how to]

Respect. The fact that you are on a first-name basis with the butcher should have underscored the importance of your steak request.

And I still go to the grocery store to get my shit, mostly because I don’t want someone picking my steak for me. I want full steak control. I also reserve the right to make an impulse pork rinds purchase if I so desire.

“I prepared this” vs. “You cooked it” is the best/worst marriage argument I’ve heard in a while.

It’s true. Literally everyone everyone is imitating Tom Waits now.

I believe that reputation comes from Shonda Rimes.

-Kelly LeBrock