Testament 2: Electric Boogaloo

Who the fuck is Jess?

“More importantly, every critic, every detractor will have to bow down to President Trump.”

Wasn’t on the show. Just part of her great mother, ASU degree getting, worked in advertising, multi-millionaire sterling reputation.

She ain’t no good mother. I took an instant dislike to Kelly when she made her daughter be the straight man for a tossed salad joke.

Just ‘cause

So gross. "Let me check your butt for cling-ons."

In Maricopa County, a lot of child deaths are at the hands of mom’s boyfriend.

Not for my sweet ass.

I don’t want to like anything Kardashian, but that is a cute picture.

Exclusively Charmin Ultra Soft!

My husband has been giving me golf lessons. He told me I needed a stronger grip, which I misinterpreted as gripping tighter. So, I blame golf.

Agree, I do not see her as a reliable narrator.

I was leaning toward “Jeremy Clarkson.”

I heard this building uses lifts to make itself appear taller.

Nope, icky.

SHUT THE FUCK UP, BOB COSTAS!!!

Here’s the gold standard for poop routines.

And the rock stacking. Cut out the cairns, people.

Don’t touch anything at a children’s museum, either. My God, the germs. The germs.