I never understood all the hate towards cats. Cats eliminate the problem of vermin, right? Vermin, which ruin food and spread disease.

You are a lucky duck if you've avoided the shitstorm of complaints against the Affordable Care Act (a.k.a. Obamacare). Let me see how succinctly I can sum it up:

I'm thinking of taking Christ out of Chrostmas and just celebrating Mas, as in the Spanish word for 'more.' More time off work, more cookies, more holiday movies, more time to spend with friends and family, more presents to both give and receive and more peace on earth a and goodwill towards men.

I love it when people try to accuse historians or academics of revisionist history when what they are really doing is combating the revisionist history that people like Sarah Palin have shoved down our throats. Our history books are a joke because of people like her harassing and, dare I say, using lawyers to change…

Well, thanks to right-wingers, I couldn't get a legal abortion of Christmas, so I had to resort to illegal means, and now both Christmas and I are in serious medical trouble.

Ooooh! I'll play!

Republican analogies are worse than Hitler.

Apple, meet Tree.

...People still say trollop?

She's not just smart...she's brilliant!

(It's Australia. That IS pretty diverse for Oz.)

I thought they sent the puritans to America and the convicts to Australia...

Having a daughter and reflecting on some of the dumb shit I pulled as a teenager makes me feel all kinds of feels when I read this. I had a friend in high school who was raped in the middle of a crowded party and no one intervened. That sort of thoughtlessness and failure to help your fellow (wo)man has haunted me for…

Personally, I prefer women with a bit of plumpness - wait, I'm a woman, nobody cares what I want.

St. Cloud? Minnesota? She vacations in St. Cloud, Minnesota? There's nothing worse you can do to her.

I went home with a dude wearing a fedora once. Why? God, why? He kept talking about he had the biggest penis that I'd ever seen. "I know you like my penis. It's SO BIG. HOLY SHIT, LUCKY TIME FOR YOU!"

Just leaving this here for anyone who hasn't seen it.

Just going to rant:

As a fat woman I don't have to admit shit to you. I owe you nothing.