WD50? Isn't that what you use to lube part of the car?

+1 for the addendum after the asterisk. That's hot.

Heck, free pizza is the whole reason I chose to be gay.

That last one is going to make me vomit prone all day.

The solution is for women to man up. We can close the gap that way. If women walk off their dizziness like men do, they won't gtplghsingae...sorry about that. Side effects from my concussion. What was I saying?

Was that an autocorrect typo, or intentional?

I….want this to happen. I want fast food pho and bang mi.

Racist.

W3rd.

Buncha Crunch are amazing. Have you ever put them on warm popcorn? It is seriously the best.

Makes sense to me, given that this is their new hamburger character:

OH GOD WHY WAS THIS THE FIST THING I SAW WHEN I CLICKED THE LINK???

As she was telling the manager her story, the owner came up to her from behind, put her in an headlock/chokehold with his left arm, and wrapped his right arm around her and stuck his thumb in her mouth. He leaned in and said "That's right, I'm your fucking boss."

Awww, you're adorable!

They taste like hatred capsules.

You gave me the idea for this whole article, actually.

I could not even read this whole thing, so strong was my urge to say that Diane looks like the FUCKING GOBLIN KING!

Oh my gad, this guy has had so much butt sex.