One thing that’s always bothered me about cannibal movies is that the cannibals always seem to eat their human flesh raw and disgusting, with lots of slurping and splashing of gore. I guess that’s supposed to amp up the horri, but I just don’t understand it. Why does becoming a cannibal also mean you no longer care…

did you see who we made president or

I mean, she looks great, but it’s flat-out bizarre that somebody who intentionally enabled child abuse gets to have a reality show about how hot (or not) she is.

Lover of liberty and tallest Keebler elf Rand Paul

“I know that’s the only way she’d ever get on camera at the Oscars, but that’s no reason to punish us”

They could have eliminated that idiot Justin Timberlake song & dance number that went on FOREVER at the beginning and had room for all the people who had passed away.

When W. is the voice of reason, things are quite fucked up.

“I was devastated by the use of my image in place of my great friend and long-time collaborator Janet Patterson...I am alive and well and an active producer.”

Like, Trump is being cornered.

you arent.

I wish Demogorgon was president. I think he’d be an improvement.

You can only shock so many White House staffers with a wierd, Eric Carle-like penis. Sometimes you just gotta get out there

All of these were preventable if the pilot did the proper pre-flight checks he’s supposed to do.

You say “taxiway”, I say “alternative runway.” ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

George Costanza.

How I picture Mike Pence pretty much everyday.

If you think Tom doesn’t cry and gaze wistfully at the sea, futilely listening for the singing of the mermaids, you would be incorrect.

Loki can do no wrong. And I hate myself for it, but it is what it is.

and simple answer is

There have been very few artists as talented and beautiful as George Michael. In spite of his decades of drug abuse, he was still so prolific and always a gentleman.