My mom: Oh a bikini? How very European of you.

Chapel Hill

Our school district made tomorrow an optional teacher work day since there weren’t going to be enough teachers or bus drivers. They hastened to add that it wasn’t “political” just “practical.”

My daughter doesn’t even it that way.

I’ve taught 13 year olds. They are NOT ready to have sex with anyone including each other. So I’m certainly not ok with it.

Just choked on my Pad Thai.

You know both these guys were vaccinated as kids—cognitive dissonance anyone?

Mr. Martha has had his pilot license since he was 16. Do you know how many times he has had an accident in the past 31 years?

I think Adele said that Beyoncé should’ve won just to deny Kanye the satisfaction of doing it himself.

You know this wouldn’t be so bad if he was some lovable goof that meant well, but instead he’s...well, you know,...him.

I’m sure he was briefed on it, but he was all, “But I got the best most firmest handshake. Limp handshakes are for losers! SAD!

You have to have self-awareness to feel shame.

And now the song is stuck in my head. But I loved that show.

Oh god I hated property and civ pro. Liked constitutional though

I am friends with two of my high school English on Facebook. One was also my journalism teacher. Because of her, I can tell good journalism from bad. Unfortunately, there is so much bad.

Yes!! The bastards.

I know. I’m sitting here thinking, “You know, that’s not a bad idea.” How did we sink so far so fast.

What? Why?

Listen, I don’t sleep at night; I need to change my antidepressant since this one is no longer getting it done, and I stress eat. I need this. My brain is overloaded on this joke of a presidency.