I prefer this Neville Longbottom

However, if your dick is neatly tucked in between two adorable kittens, then yes. Because kittens make everything ok.

Especially not ever those.

Nope.

Yeap, lots of yogurts give me the same reaction. I recently found Icelandic yogurt, and I love it!! Plain is delicious, amazingly thick and the protein levels are unusually high. On the other hand, most super-market brands I find gross, but I have that reaction to most foods with fillers and artificial sweeteners.…

*whispers* Beg for or buy some simple syrup at your neighborhood bar. No need to make it yourself.

Back in 2007, I wrote this Christmas Carol for my dog.

Every song is made better when you change it to be about cats.

I walked my dog this morning & after 5 min..I was soaking wet. We looked at each other & said fuck this shit..and went back in the house.

Dude, this is my EXACT hair routine. Exactly. Ok, I tend to alternate between messy bun and fishtail braid. But so close. I have wavy, fine-textured hair and a lot of it that tends to be frizzy and dry, so it actually looks better if I only wash it a couple times a week. But I'm always pushing it that extra day…

I have long, very fine curly hair. It is very soft and lovely when it wants to be, and sometimes there's juuuust enough humidity that my curls spiral in a most lovely way.

My summer (ok, year round) method of dealing with waist length hair is as follows:

Well, they do call it "going commando."

I get up and leave my house before my husband and kids are even awake. They can make their own goddamn breakfast. I gotta get to work. And surf Jezzie. :-)

oh jezebel, fuck this noise. that juror's comments? are the footnotes that support the claim "not guilty". and these four? agreed with her in deliberation. caved to her when shit got rough. they don't get to back away now that that juror cut through all the bullshit to the painful, racist truth to their verdict.

Are we not even going to talk about Sharktopus? It's the navy's next superweapon.

Also drink your liquor neat or on the rocks. The sugary, neon-colored shit in cocktails and mixed drinks is almost as bad for you as the alcohol.*