People should really quit asking her things.

Somewhere, likely a large, child-free mansion, Jennifer Aniston is slathered in Aveeno and laughing her ass off.

Im so confused by Lindsay’s whole statement. Wasn’t she in a relationship where the guy was photographed attacking her after she threw his phone out of the car and then she bitched about how nobody reported on her being in an abusive relationship or wanted to help her? 

Oh and the other rub? In order to make room for this new category and to shorten the show, they’re going to likely announce the technical awards (sound mixing, sound editing, best shorts, etc.) during commercial break. Remember, these are not your blockbuster stars here, these are the average folks who do the boring…

Ok, so I’m an Oscars nerd. Here’s why this is such a big deal and people are mad, by creating this “blockbuster” category (which we don’t even know the qualifications for) the academy is essentially creating a bucket category that they can throw all the popular movies that they don’t like but make a lot of money a…

Said the same thing! The “I’m not a...but” combo is trouble, unless it’s something like “I’m not usually a fan of raw fish but this sashimi is delicious!”

Ah, I see. So it’s less “How dare they award some Marvel picture an award?” and more, “How dare they award that awesome Marvel movie some shitty consolation prize?”

What did Lindsay think she was saying with that word salad?

Some of it is snootiness, because the Oscars, like every award, is made-up, and depends entirely on reputation to keep up the prestige. Anything that might lessen the prestige hurts the Oscar as an award.

I don’t understand either.  They both have enough money to take care of all the kids.  What’s the problem?  Don’t do child support.  Just do 50-50 custody.  They live how they live with Mom and they live how they live with Dad.   Mom and dad take turns housing/feeding/clothing them.

LiLo, here’s a little lesson for you. If you start a sentence, “I’m going to hate myself for saying this, but....”, take a beat and just don’t finish the thought. See also: “I don’t mean for this to be offensive but”; “I’m not a racist/homophob/misogynist (you get the picture), but”. 

One thing about iOS that annoys me: if I block a number, the blocked caller can still leave me a voice message in a “blocked message” folder.

i used to answer every call. when they’d start with the “we’re calling about your mortgage/credit card,” i’d respond “liar.” they’d usually go “excuse me?!?” and i’d go “i called you a liar. i don’t have a credit card or a mortgage.” they’d usually hang up. my FAVORITE was the heating company calling about my furnace.…

I like to yell “I DON’T HAVE A CREDIT CARD!” at the robocall from ‘My Credit Card Company’.

If I don’t know the number, I don’t pick up. If it’s a legit call and they don’t leave a voicemail with a call back then I don’t care.

But goddamned if that isn’t like herding cats though.

I’m in a vote by mail state. We get a big voter book explaining all the candidates and positions, and our ballots, weeks before Election Day. Plenty of time to read and think about and fill out the ballot.  New this year, you don’t even need to put a stamp on it to put it in the mail.  Last year, primary turnout was…

What’s the difference between a Republican and a Saltine cracker?

“Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez hates white people, calls real Americans ‘saltines’. Is she the most racist candidate in the history of American democracy? We find out tonight at 11 when we spend 5 hours saying ‘Yes!’.”