I got the shittiest, most disgusting manager fired at my shitty job *after I left it.*

This woman was known among my circle of friends up the road in Indianapolis. To be clear: he tried to kill her, then he tried to destroy all of her equipment. As far as I’m concerned, he did the only good thing he will do in his life.

If I may suggest a bit of recourse: sue the ever loving fuck out of the police department and the state. Discuss.

I fucking hate myself for how much I love these posts. Oh, those crazy kids!

One time I dated this guy who had a “super powerful” vibrator. Great!! More orgasms, I thought! 7 min in and I’m completely numb. Can’t feel a thing. I imagine these milkshakes are pretty much the same but with sugar pleasure.

You guys have to stop publishing lists like this when I’m feeling this frustrated with the world and gun acquisition is so easy. Let’s just say it’s been a bad Christmas and leave it at that.

dear god all the fucking truth. Beyond just cops, there is always the undercurrent with some that rape, harassment, DV, or sexual assault is women-shit that, somehow, someway, they are responsible for.......”if you dig into the situation a little.”

All my joy is born of these tears today.

Yes. Cry, you shit stain on the ass of humanity. But first, let me get my finest crystal.

How did you guys get this picture of my dad in 1983?

To quote Troy Barnes: “I have the weirdest boner.”

I just.

I just turned 28 and now I’m pretty sure I’m in actual cancer range, which is terrifying on the daily. Naturally, I smoke to calm my nerves.

HA. I did that on accident.

Watch the TechCrunch video. She fucking nails it.

I only work covering food in Indianapolis, but I’m happy to say that Colts players are universally nice people and generous tippers. No word on the Pacers except that they love playing paintball together, which is a really nice visual. Bunch of 7-foot tall men running and screaming and giggling.

This alarm clock is the only reason I can regularly go to sleep at 4 and still make 9 am meetings. For the love of god, if you have problems waking up, BUY IT. Also they look pretty damn cool on your bedside table.

This alarm clock is the only reason I can regularly go to sleep at 4 and still make 9 am meetings. For the love of…

My old racist retail boss made us follow around black women. Our most prolific shoplifter was a well-dressed, 60-something white woman with a nasty pill addiction. To which I say HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.

Nah she’s a fully terrifying ancient blueblood. I’m not intimidated my people and I won’t talk to her without a thorough mirror check, and she’s not even my grandma. Her outfit/hair critiques are more devastating than your average seasoned drag queen.

My best friends ultra-rich grandmother is like this. When they bought their last vacation home, she would just go into furniture stores and buy up the room exactly as they’d set it up on the showroom floor and ask to mail them a bill, which her husband paid with a credit card. She sent us out to buy ten towels and a…