He looks like he has to pee really bad.

This is so hard for me to fathom. If your wife is grimacing, gtfoff. Is that whole ‘do on to others’ thing postponed due to erection?

I think the key word is ‘mockingly’

Oh man this data is going to get ‘accidentally’ hacked/leaked for sure. ): ): ):

Eh...I disagree. He’s muddying the water and claiming that would just be impossible for him to do -impossible!- because...uh..something something legal...look I just don’t want to talk to my lady coworkers okay? He’s not saying, let me get out of the way, he’s declining to do something helpful.

I feel like a lot of people would vote for Bilbo Baggins so...

Why would it even matter if they let them know? They’re still paying for that food. Honestly if I had a text day-off I would have thought “What?! I don’t care! Stop distracting me!”

There actually is some strong evidence that early Greek religion was much more matriarchal! *pushes nerd glasses back on nose*

OMG OMG OMG!!!1

I don’t blame them. Baseball games are boring.

#DopePope to #NopePope

Thankfully our savior has already revealed himself.

Holy shit that is a kind of horrible that, if the world were right and just, would have caused him to implode through his own asshole as soon as he said it. I’m so sorry.

Can I be out of treys now? I promise I’ll be good!

I mostly opened this article to see why this was the picture.

Whaaaaaaa - but I thought this was about her religion and not bigotry! I am so confused now! Where are all those pundits who swore she was just protecting her own pure Christian soul?! I’m sure there’s an explanation!