I think it was more like for kicking the bride and groom out of their room!

Did you...read the whole thing?

I had a guy try to do me and two of my friends at once. We were all master students and the negs were: Me: “I would have expected a masters student to take French and Spanish, but maybe I’m expecting too much.” Friend A: “I’m not sure I could ever fall for a girl with tattoos, but I’m sure yours have a lot of meaning…

And why am I still in grey!!??? HELP ME!!!

Who is cheering in that video? Who spent their day cheering at Donald Trump’s presidential announcement?!

WHAT THE HELL!!??

It varies by job. My last job tested when I started and had a clause that said they could test you randomly at any time, but it was rare unless you were fucking up.

How would Tyrone even have her boyfriend’s number? Or her email?

I mean it is actually based on the War of the Roses so.... 10 points to Snooptherin.

“How many crane shots should we use?”

But wouldn’t it be super prejudicial to prevent people from becoming police officers just because they don’t have fathers?

Is it weird that androgynous or gender neutral almost always means masculine?

That doesn’t always work, unfortunately. It’s better to shield your eyes from the light and try to look through, because of the lighting difference.

I’ve never been to a concert and now it’s a Big Thing to friend and family. Apparently my first one has to be good.. Suggestions on what my first concert should be?

Good! The world needs more cunty preacher moms and less uninvolved laid-back 'kids will be kids' nincompoops.

Oh cousins. Mine kept following me around during the wedding giving me helpful feedback. "You need to stand now. You need to do another table visit. Why don't you have orange juice?" Finally my husband snapped at her and she went away. Thankfully, she hasn't spoken to me since!

Not a disaster, but we did our RSVPs in the form of madlibs. I thought it would be funny to display the best ones at the event. We had instructions and you could fill in funny things like "We wish the bride and groom years of [noun]." Funny right? Well no one got it. Like two people understood and filled it in funny.…

Guys she did an armbar with her ABS!!!!!

My parents begged to be lied to because they reacted negatively about everything! I could never predict. Wore the wrong shoes to a party (YOU'LL MESS UP YOUR SPINE WALKING IN THOSE AND THEN WHAT!), used the wrong pen (YOU USED BLUE HE IS GOING TO FAIL YOU AND THEN YOU'LL NEVER GET INTO COLLEGE), the list goes on. So I…

Nightly show pisses me off. We don't need more shows that give time and attention to a group of people totally uneducated about whatever issue they're discussing.