"I'll have my cream with tea today, Mum."

I love that that photo is just like, your dorky friends on Facebook. Not like "We are celebrities on a perfectly stage celebrity moment". Makes me like them more.

Hayden, I'ma let you have your baby, but, Jessica Simpson's first pregnancy was the longest of all time.

Jen i also want to know, if her mom is also being carried around like a baby.

"Let me say this. I only expect the black media to uphold the standards of excellence in journalism and when you do that you have to go in with a neutral mind," Cosby said.

"Is it me or did it seem like Panettiere was pregnant for like a full year? I don't know why, maybe because she just rocked that belly so hard, but to me, she's just been pregnant forever."

According to the cops, the cab driver technically didn't break any laws because he did not seem to mean Alexis any harm though her parents are now pushing for laws that require taxi drivers to verify the age of young passengers traveling alone.

Why does George Clooney have my haircut in this gif?

When flat butts and muffintop become de rigueur I will be a GODDESS!

I thought British porn was a properly made cup of tea being stirred at just the right speed, with a steamy kettle whistling in the background. And a splash of milk at the end. Biscuit foreplay.

You are watching the wrong porn.

I was counting the seconds until Dworkin acolytes showed up. Brilliant.

"Penetration by any object 'associated with violence'"

Like the English didn't practically INVENT spanking/caning porn.

No, that royally pissed me off. Let's ban male ejaculation while we're at it.

So facefucking and male ejaculation are banned too?

Seriously. The first time I threw up all over a guy's dick and my throat burned for the next day or so I got the impression that this fun, harmless activity should maybe be performed with a bit more caution on his part and a bit less thoughtless enthusiasm on mine.

Facesitting, huh? Face-fucking still encouraged, though, I presume.