Holy fuck. With all the shit that's happenning right now, I had legit forgotten that election debates are coming up. I don't know whether to panic or laugh.

I don’t care what anyone says (not that anyone cares about what I think of Pere or his dick), but...

My dad is having renal surgery next week, so all our Christmas stuff is going up this weekend. Empathy just goes right out the window for most people.

I used to think he was kind of charming- then I realized what a pain in the ass he must be (also, talk about having a 'type'.

Sure there should be better compensation, but who goes on a long sea voyage for pleasure?!

Jack has merit. Rose is just seeking her 15 of fame.

I’m an ectopic pregnancy survivor. I spent days feeling unwell, thinking it was the return of menstrual cramps (I had recently stopped nursing my one year old and was expecting my period) -until one morning I couldn’t even sit down. Had I not googled my symptoms and sent sceen grabs to my ex, he wouldn’t have believed…

My dad raised me to talk politics from an early age. When I was eleven, bored out of my mind like the ungrateful mierdita I was, I crafted a lie with which to greet my poor papa at the door. I told him about how Fidel Castro had died. The old man was nearly in tears; he then went to the Latin market and proceeded to…

That’s what they all seem to be saying nowadays. Is there an early dementia epidemic, or are they all clients of the same PR firm? Nvm- it’s a club.

I wanted to see this, despite the horrible reviews- because it seemed fucked up enough that it might actually be intriguing, and then you gave me no spoiler alert. I’m devastated.

“We should have a contest as to which of the Networks, plus CNN and not including Fox, is the most dishonest, corrupt and/or distorted in its political coverage of your favorite President (me). They are all bad. Winner to receive the FAKE NEWS TROPHY!”

Of course she regrets it. Now everyone knows what a self hating monster she is. Gtfo- your clothes always sucked anyway.

Rand Paul looks like he just had an undesired taste of the Trump brand creamsicle. Even the devil would cry himself to sleep if he currently worked in the White House.

My ex walked like that, intentionally, and it drove me fucking crazy. In his barefoot shoes. He was hot and toned, but I had to let him go.

He basically sees himself as some lord, goutfully riding in on his pure blood horse, tossing coins and rotten apples at a crowd of passing peasants. I’m so disgusted. These are American citizens, and even if they weren’t, they are people, who need help and deserve to have their dignity respected.

I’m not getting married because I don’t fucking want to, thank you. I was proposed to, by two exes, and my current partner has been by my side for five years, with two kids- HAPPILY. I’m an atheist anarchist though- so I guess I’m already damaged goods anyway. Lots of women don’t want to marry anymore, because we have…

I think I have a new man crush.

I had a meltdown during a sixth grade school trip, when unbeknownst to me, we stepped into a butterfly conservancy pavilion. It was the most terrifying experience of my life (and I’ve delivered my own baby in a moving truck); it didn’t help my standing as a social outcast either. I don’t care about Kylie, but I…

Y’all can be as polite as you want.

Absolutely wonderful. May protective laws soon follow.