The ‘Betty Cooper strip-tease musical number at a biker bar’ was at least shark-adjacent.

The cast bios are hilarious. I particularly like these:

How would a show whose first season included a drug dealing Ginger wigged maple syrup cult actually jump the shark.? They’re all robots? It’s secretly a holodeck sim Riker is running?

needs more Sweet Pea

This show kickflipped over a shark in its first 5 minutes and hasn’t broken its SICK COMBO since.

Considering Casey Cott’s background in musical theater, it would be weird not to let Kevin sing at least one song?

Cheryl as Carrie is pretty obvious casting but should still be fun. Madelaine Petsch definitely excels both at portraying her character’s vulnerability as well as scariness.

He’s huge so that he can make other people look tough when they take hits from him in a fight. Given that he should have more experience fighting, as a gang member, realistically, he should be kicking Reggie and Archie’s asses a lot more of the time. Good lord that turtleneck is an awful look though!

Out of nowhere I loved Sweet Pea in this episode too. Also that guy is huge, which I somehow had not realized. He might be more of a moose than Moose.

Sweet Pea became my low-key favorite character this episode. “Woo! Fuck yeah, real school! I’m gonna wear a turtleneck!”

Underrated relationship on the show: Archie and Cheryl. Archie saving Cheryl at the frozen lake last season is still my favorite ever scene on the show. And Archie made sure to get Cheryl DOUBLE the money from her (almost) rapist, and Cheryl covered for him with Veronica, even though she like everyone else figured out…

I feel like Veronica being bummed that Betty & Archie kissed was much the same as my reaction when it happened—oh god this triangle is never going to end is it. I wish I was dead

Where did the second motorcycle come from??? Jughead was using F.P.’s bike, wasn’t he? But now, F.P. has found another so they can take “one last father-son ride”? (They did describe it like that, right? That’s also weird.)

While I’m 1,000% with you on being appalled that Alice Cooper neither tried to get her daughter off the stage while she did a strip tease (I know she was tipsy, but even a tipsy mom would have tried to get to the stage!) or forced her to leave with her, let’s be real here: Alice Cooper has never been a good mom. Not…

...to drive home drunk.

Oh god, Veronica saying “make it” was terrible. I guess this is a pastiche show and they gave her euphemisms from an early 70s sitcom? Shudder.

Side note, can Alice really be considered a good mom? I mean she did leave her daughter at the bar after the dance

Having Betty, a teen, strip tease infront of men is the point at which i have to say Im out.

Nah, he didn’t say that “That night i realized. It was like we were playing a game of snakes and ladders. Me, Betty, Archie, Veronica. And in one fell swoop we all slid of the board and into free fall. And not just us. Other people, maybe innocent, maybe not, had been dragged in our game as old wounds reopened. and…