I have to disagree on Hendricks. SO MANY times on the red carpet it’s looked like she does not know how to dress her body, and “could she just bring Janie Bryant with her everywhere she goes” is a question I have asked. But aside from the bow-cape...thing, I think this looks fabulous on her.

Somewhere, Anne Hathaway is primal-screaming into the void.

Yes? I...sorry, I just feel REALLY bad for Michigan students and parents that this is even a question. Every school I have attended, worked in, or visited (RI, CT, MA, NH) has its own school nurse. I’ve literally never heard of a school that doesn’t. What do you do with injuries? Sickness? Immunization? Lice?…

As far as anyone can work out, yeah. Although Celebitchy’s assertion that “something fishy is going on besides not wanting everyone in their business” is...weird. I mean, unless they actually ARE an alien god and a mutant superhero (I am not discounting this theory, for the record) I think “not wanting randos in your…

Yes.

For some reason I just love Abigail Breslin.* I know everyone wants to be friends with JLaw and Schumer, but I feel like that would be EXHAUSTING after a few hours and Abigail would be the friend you could eat half a pizza and marathon 30 Rock with afterwards.

I was going to say that they kind of avoid the trope of “LOOK AT THE WORST THING THAT CAN HAPPEN TO A WOMAN” by having it happen to an alpha male but then remembered that a) rape of anyone as a plot device = NOT GREAT, BOB and b) the book falls right into the pit of Magical Healing Lovesex a few chapters later, which,…

The woman in red. “FUCKSAKE, GREG. ARE YOU FUCKING KIDING ME”

I am shocked—SHOCKED—that Robin Thicke’s girlfriend looks just like his ex-wife, only half her age! Who could have seen that coming?!

As a coastal New Englander I was SO EXCITED to finally get a movie about whaling because it’s all you learn about in elementary school. Obviously as an adult I don’t condone whaling, but since this was less about actual whaling and more about getting righteously beat down and having the will to survive (and shirtless…

We say this in my family whenever we need anything. Ice cream, laundry, dental floss, whatever.

Keep crying, shitfuck.

Well, this was a lot more cry-for-help-ier than I was expecting. Happy Tuesday!

When I looked up, Tess was standing at the register with this bizarre look on her face. I asked if she’d like anything, her usual water perhaps, and she just stared at me with a bemused expression. I tried a few more times to make contact, but there were more customers behind her so I told her I’d have to help them…

I was at a con a couple of weeks ago and the pic line for him was 1) expensive and 2) practically to the state border. HOWEVER. I got stuck in the mass of humanity that is a con crowd *right next to his photobooth* and if you think I didn’t stare like a crazy person through a sizable gap in the curtain, well, you…

Working in the public sector isn’t always great, and the fact that people can look up my salary is kind of creepy, but man does it avoid this shady kind of bullshit, for which I am grateful.

...I was like, “why would she be showering with turtles?!”

ONE HUNDRED MEEEELION DOLLAIRS

I am an Episcopalian and therefore VERY CONCERNED, as we are raised on an IV of gin and tonics and silent judgment.